This post is gonna be long. Wordy. And most likely non-relevant to 99% of you. Or wait, i count. Only maybe 5 persons are involved for real. That means only 0.00067% of the people reading this are the ones who were actually involved in it and would then be keen.
But despite the low demand for it, i'd put in 200% heart just so that i can share the truth, once and for all. And not have to deal with drama anymore when people come tell me a different story that they heard, each time.
So Silver blogged a longass post about me.
Now brace yourselves, becox..
So you better get comfortable. It's gonna be long. Like REALLY long.
And it's based on a true story. No no, it IS, in fact, a true story.
7 years ago
When we first met at the school pageant, i already thought you were a charming, attractive and confident lady. Your moves were so swift. Everybody likes you. And then we started off with SMS-ing each other more after you graduate. And then we hang out to meet for the first time. It was at night. Like late night.
You had problems with your relationship. I listened.
Months down the road, i had my first bf turn out to be an asshole. You listened. And then i listened to yours.
And then i listened to yours. And then.. I listened to yours. When we meet up, we only meet up during the night time. Sometimes we sit in your car. Once we went to Mustafa. Once while waiting for your other half to contact you, i invited you to bunk in with me at my parents' place. My sisters and mother all thought you were so pretty! Everybody likes you. And it comes so naturally.
Sometimes we sit in the 7-11 at bencoolen. Sometimes we laugh. Sometimes we cry. Most of the time, we sing in your car. I'm sure our emotions were raw. We had lots to offer despite the rejections we get. They can hurt us but we dared to Love. We.. were young.. I admire you a lot, for how much you can love your other-half, with no reservation.
And then i recovered from the heartbreak with the help of my other girlfriends.
Same time, you had some competition at the TV station. I helped pass out tickets to your fans sometimes. I was so proud of you. I thought you'd go places.
And then through that competition, you met your next bf. And you continue seeing him for another 2 years or so, you were flying, you were fine. We don't meet up that often anymore though we sometimes keep in touch over SMS. Which is good! Cox that means you're doing fine, i'd assume.
4 years plus ago
Then your relationship became shaky. You asked me out. We went for karoake that night. You drank quite a bit. You sang til you cry. Then you wanted to send me home. I said we should take a cab. You said no, and you insisted. I was foolish enough to go along.
We were on a straight road but you went left and you went right.. And we almost bang into something, twice. I think there must be a reason why we both survived til today to do this trash out. I asked myself too, why did i let that happen. Endangering both of us that night. But you were so.. Wild with emotions.
We got to my place somehow. We chatted for a bit more and i asked you to stay over. You said no and then you said
"Alright.. You should go back in.. At least you have someone in there, waiting for you to go home.."
"Unlike me.. I have nobody.."
And then you started crying and..
Yeah, that was you banging your head on the steering wheel horn.
So i held you tight so that you can't move forward to do that again. And we both cried and..
KONG-KONG-KONG-KONG-KONG!!!
Yeah, that was you banging your head on the car window.
So i had to hold you tighter. I mean jokes aside, i felt your sadness. I did. And next you fist punch your own head. And i manage to calm you down after that.. For a while.
So in the short while that i have, i called my boyfriend to come out and help me help you inside.
He came out. I got out of the car too, with your handbag, so that i could go over to your side to help.
He opened the car door. Said hello to you. And he reached his hand to take your car key so that you can't drive off and hit someone down along the way or injure yourself. So that we could all get into the house.. And you went
AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
The effort you put into your singing lessons, they paid off. So you screamed. Like. Really. Loudly.
And within split seconds you started hitting and punching him and then you pulled his hand closer and then you know this part,
So you bit him on the fingers and then you snatch the keys away from him and then you drove off.
So i needed to call someone. And i took out your handphone. I called your mum, she didn't pick up. Then i called your home, nobody picked up. So left with no choice, i had to call your bf, who was staying less than 5 minutes away from my house at the time.
Within minutes, you drove back for your handbag. I refuse to give it to you. I told you to come out of the car and stay for one night. You didn't want to. And then your bf came..
And you saw him and you screamed at me "WHY DID YOU CALL HIM!!! I TRUSTED YOU!!! I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY FRIEND!!!! WHY DID YOU CALL HIM!!! WHY DID YOU CALL HIM!!! WHY~~AAAAHHHAHHHHHHHH!!!!"
And then i sat outside my house with my boyfriend.. Just watching your car bouncing up and down, with you inside knocking, kicking and hitting on anything you can.. And him holding you down and getting punched and hit by you every now and then. Since we're talking about it now, i'd like you to know that, i too think that he totally deserve it. This one, we're on the same track.
And then occasionally there will be the BORBORBORBORBOR and then the KONGKONGKONGKONG and AHHHHHHHHHHHHH~
If i was watching a movie in the theater, i probably got the best view plus the most supreme sound system then.
IF ONLY IT WASN'T 1.30AM AT NIGHT.
IF ONLY WE DIDN'T HAVE NEIGHBOURS SLEEPING ACROSS THE STREET AND BESIDE OUR SHOPHOUSE.
So the first police car with two policemen arrived..
You were just stoning. Not replying much of their questions. But when they turn their back to talk to me, you started your drama again.
So then came two more police car with four policemen.
You really draw crowds. No, you do. You gotta keep that. Haha.
And the police wanted to bring you back to detain you for until you're at least sober/ calm before taking your statement.
I asked, SHIVERING, I SWEAR, "Can you please not?" =OOO Fuck, that's extreme courage dude!!! I REQUESTED TO DENY A POLICEMAN'S INSTRUCTION! Watch out, we got a badass over here!!
Lolol.
So the police asked me how can he leave you here when you are in such a violent condition.
And i cried. HAHAHA. I don't know!!! I was just so scared that they'd take you away to some shitty lock up and then you might hate me for that, forever!!! So i cried!!! And i said "But she'd be fine.. She's just a little upset with the bf, that's all"
And then the police didn't agree or disagree to not bring you back to the station.
He digress to ask me a question that made me stutter.
=OOOOOOO I'm thinking inside me, FUCK THIS SHIT I'M NOT DOING THIS!!!!!!! I'm not gonna lie but i'm not gonna say the truth and get you into trouble!!!!!!!
So i said "By the time she got worked up, the car was already here. So she sat in there and she became really agitated when the boyfriend came"
I am so smart =D I siam-ed the policeman's question and told him something else to divert his attention lolol, which was, still the truth =DDD But i didn't lie! Lol. But i was stuttering so badly and sweating like a pig cox i was so scared O.O
In my head, there was only one thing.. The police have to go. Cox 1) You cannot go get lock up. Cox your debut single album was gonna release next week and you cannot have these nonsense happening to you at that time 2) Fts, i don't wanna be the bad guy! If you really got taken away outside my house, it'd be like i am the one who let the police take you wtf. No, i don't want to take that under my name!
And the police told me 10 minutes later "Are you sure i can leave her with you? Becox if she gets hurt, or if she hurts someone, the responsibility will be on you. Becox i want to bring her back to the police station and you don't want this to happen. So you gonna be held responsible if anything happen, do you understand this?"
So i said "Okay, yeah, i'm sure she'd be okay"
Right after i said that, me and all the policemen turned to look at you, you were knocking your head against the window still. Haha. It was dramatically funny. So i said,
"Err.... Maybe not now. But later, she'd be fine later"
The policemen all left. They had stayed for around 40 minutes. Pretty long. Too long.
I sat by the koi pond.. With my bf.. Just watching you and your bf in the car. We didn't dare to go in. In case you guys need us to help you with something. And most of the time you're just crying and shouting at him.. Next you guys hug.. And then the cycle goes on..
At 4.21am, he hand signaled to us, to tell us to go in and gave us a okay sign.
I am not so sure.. We went up and i was watching your car from there, until he drove you off.
And then too soon, 6am came, my bf had to go prepare for work. I'm more lazy, i called control center earlier on to cancel my flight. Reporting at 6.15am would mean i have to get ready at 4.30am. Lol. Not gonna make it.
And i text you the next day.. And the next day.. And the next day.. You didn't reply. So i had to ask your bf who then, soon became ex bf. He really didn't treat you right but at least he could assure me that you are physically safe and he told me to give you some time alone.
Months passed. No news.
My bf didn't fancy me hanging out with you in the future cox he thinks it's really selfish and inconsiderate, reckless and immature of you to put me and you through the danger of drunk-driving and then later create all these scene when you were already not drunk-drunk anymore.
And i remember weeks after the incident, he once asked me, "Did she call you? To apologise or anything of sort?"
So it's not like he didn't want to 'FORGIVE'. He did look forward to what you have to say. But you never came along with it in time.
3 Years Ago
I joined a TV competition. Towards the end, you got in touch. The first time i saw you after not meeting you for ages.. Was at my 21st birthday gathering they organised for me. After the gathering we went for yakun toast at the airport. Great to finally see you in a time zone other than during wee hours.
It was different. It felt different. I thought.. Maybe it's just normal, since we haven't got in touch for so long. And that incident happened. None of us spoke about it. I actually thought you should apologise to my bf at least, if not us both. But of course, the valid time frame for an apology would be a few months after the incident. And we were way passed that.
I was okay with you. If not, i wanted to be okay with you again. I wanted the friendship to work again.
And my bf knows that. Although he doesn't give the widest smile when i talk about you but he respect that i still wanted you as a friend then.
And somewhere along the way, i started this blog.
2 years ago
Then you started your blog! I was happy for you and for myself mainly! Cox i could catch up on your thoughts and your happenings. I even linked you up on the sidebar with your picture, told people to visit, who cares if i only had 500 readers a day! It doesn't matter! It wouldn't matter between us, i thought.
Then i told you i wanna go camwhore at Haji Lane. And you said you'd join, you need picture for your blogbanner anyway. So we went. And we camwhored a lot. I photoshopped all the pictures and you're free to use them. But you watermarked all the pictures with your blog address. And then you sent that whole big bunch of pictures from your camera to me for me to photoshop them for you. They are like 80% your camwhoring shots.. Say whaaat?
Yes you did blog about how watermarking pictures can draw some people to your blog, if someone chooses to use your picture and their readers might be curious and then will go visit your blog etc. I know.. Hits are important to you. I know. You always look to climb, you always talk about how you wanna move forward in life, be bigger things. Go further miles. It's good that you're so ambitious.
But really, this is a friendly advice, please don't watermark your blog address on pictures that are not yours. Haha. When we went to meet Liu Qian the magician, you did that too. And on many other occasions, You took the pictures i took and that i photoshopped, that i put on my blog, you took it and watermark it with your blog address. I mean you probably didn't think much of it, but since you have so many advice for me on your blog, this is one friendly advice for you =)
Then the post i blogged about to retaliate hateful comments got picked up and got blown out of proportion, about me wanting a boob job sponsor if there is a clinic who's keen. I got slammed and flamed by STOMP, by netizens, by the newspaper.. Calling me a begger. Begging people for things. It wasn't exactly happy time.
When we were talking about it.. I was trying to be positive, and i said, "Haiyah, whatever lah. They want to give me news.. I take it as bad news is better than no news lor" and you told me that it's not bad, saying something controversial and then driving lotsa traffic to the blog. I said yeah, but it's traffic leaving nasty comments and it'd die down anyway.
And you told me to imagine if a kids' show TV host like yourself, were to even say anything vaguely vulgar on the blog, people will go mad jumping on you and your language and how inappropriate it is.
NEXT THING YOU DID, you shifted your birthday wish list post that was moving down to the previous pages, back to the top post, opening acceptance to anyone who wish to send you gifts.
And then the next post (still below the birthday wish list post cox you scheduled the post to be the top post for quite a while), you posted a long angry post, filled with expletives and vulgar language to the core, asking whoever owes you money to return you the sum. Even putting in their full names.
Like i said.. It's good for me that you started blogging.. Becox if not, i'd never known you past your heartbreaks.. And past how you deal with your love relationships. I've only seen you vulnerable.. I've hardly seen how you react to things and how you handle things on normal day-to-day basis.
I don't know what's your favourite food. I don't know what's your favourite colour. I don't know much about you. Except that you are someone with a lot of drive in you. Always ready to take a step forward in whatever things you want, you get.
1.5 year ago
I went for an audition at Clicknetwork. They asked me if i would be keen in doing Bored in Bikinis 2. I said i might consider ONLY if i have boobs to start with if not i'd never wear a bikini. And they knew about the asking for boob job sponsor on blog hooha, so they casually ask, "If we could find you a boob job sponsor, you'd consider doing BiB2?" I said, yeah find me the sponsor first! LOL.
And then they ask me if i were to do BiB2, do i have an ideal partner in mind who is of the same frequency as me.
So i told them about you. They asked me, what are you good at.. I told them you're really pretty. And you speak really well. And you're good with hosting, and that you've hosted several TV programs before. And you can sing too. And you used to fly, so i'm sure you'd have some good knowledge about beauty/ skincare and whatnots.
Few weeks later, you went down for your audition. They told you about the boob job i'm looking at and then you said you'd like to do liposuction then you'd do BiB2. And you told them you could do all sort of genre of shows. Travel, food, beauty, music, shopping, lifestyle, anything. And they asked you what do you think i'm good at, you said i could buy cheap stuff and make them look good. Thank you.
Later clicknetwork was interviewed in an article on Straits Times URBAN. About new personalities online who dare to bare and flash for attention.
So Clicknetwork introduced both of us to be interviewed. The article is about me wanting boob job and you wanting lipo before we do BiB2. And we both got onto the front page of URBAN. That was neat. And becox of that, people look at us as a pair. Like a BFF blogging buddy.
Not long later, i started doing Budget Barbie. My blog daily unique readers went from 700 (thanks to URBAN, it jumped and increased by 200 steadily) to 1500 instantly. You will constantly ask me what my stats is. So that's how i remember then. That i was 1500 when you were 700.
And then a skincare/ beauty company marketing girl, D, asked you to arrange for a meetup, with me and her. Woah this part, is complicated.
D used to be from another makeup company by the way, and she emailed me before she jumped to this skincare/ beauty company. And i couldn't make it to her event but i did say she could contact me next time if there are other events.
But you went for that makeup event and that's how you two got each other's contact.
And one day you called me saying D's company ask you to arrange a meet up with me, you and her cox her company wanna re-brand and wants to contract us as their online ambassadors.
I told you, "It sounds good! You go ahead ba. I don't think i wanna be tied down to one brand"
I'm sorry i lied.
My face was in a ultimate disastrous condition at that time. Look. Lol. So i badly needed a facial/ skincare sponsor. But i said no to you becox you've done all these things recently that i mentioned above, that i thought i don't quite like.
So then you said okay, and later you call me back. You said you called D and she say she'd still prefer to speak to both of us at one time. So i said okay in that case, I'd go.
And so we went. During the first meeting, all the terms were discussed. Then D went back to send a confirmation over email to both of us. Then she prepared the contract, email it for both of us to go through, we had no problem with it. So so we arrange for a second meeting to sign the contract.
We were having lunch and casual convo, D and her associate, me and you. And then you were saying how much NN offered to pay you per advertorial if you sign your blog with them. So i said, "WOW. That sounds like a super good deal lah!!! Sign lor! What's holding you back!"
And you said, "Yeah, it's not bad right? I mean.. Look at you, it's better than you having to do like what..? Five? Or Seven? Five to seven ads before you can earn the same amount"
Awkward silence..
And then i said, "Yeah, but those are blogshop ads, need much lesser effort as compared to the proper full length adverts lah"
And you say "Yeah, but still.."
"And anyway i can't really do blogshop ads cox my blog is more like a artiste's blog so not so nice"
And then we went on to talk about blogging in general. I LOVE THIS PART THE MOST. It's the most unbelievable part before i realise more unbelievable parts later on.
You went on to say what kind of blogger you are.
"I'm very different as a blogger.. In the sense.. I am also an artiste.. So if you look at Joanne Peh, Felicia Chin, Jeanette Aw's blogs, when you look at their blogs, it's always safe, prim and proper.. Mainly about updates of their up and coming shows.. Some behind-the-scene shots.. That's about it. It's very 2-Dimensional.
But when you come to my blog. You see me for who i am. AS-IS. Yes you might have seen me on TV as a village girl, as a lawyer, or even as a rape victim, but when you go to my blog.. It's a totally different side of me that you see. It's more 3D. I am just who i am, and i can blog about all these things that the rest of the artiste don't. So in this sense i'm very distinguished as a blogger or as an artiste."
*round of applause*
Nice marketing speech for yourself after putting me down.
By the way, you were probably feeling insecure then cox you asked me for my stats and i told you i have 1500 daily and you told me oh, not bad, you are a 700 but moving upward. But do you have to do this? Cox we were each offered a contract.
It's not like we have to hardsell ourselves to fight for that one contract. So i really don't know why you have to do that. Remember after that in the night time, we were sitting at the coffeeshop around my place? You asked me what's my blog stats again. And i told you the same.. 1.5k daily.
And then i signed the contract that day itself. You said you have to bring it back for your artiste manager to go through. So you didn't sign it. We were each offered $2k cash, $7 worth of services, for a one year contract.
Within a week, you told me you are not going to sign the contract with D's company cox you were offered another skincare/ beauty blog assignment from another company. $1.2k for 6 weeks of weekly blogging. So you told me that you'd take up that $1.2k for 6 weeks first cox the money is better, the term of contract is shorter, and when it's done and over with, you'd come join me at D's offer.
Both companies are doing almost the same things, offering almost the same services, selling their own products. And you wanna take up the offer from the other company cox the money is better given that's only for 6 weeks, it's fine, that's your choice.
When D was informed by you, she told me that in that case, we could proceed with the ambassadorship with me alone first. And so we did.
Then clicknetwork found us a keen sponsor who was willing to help me for my boob job and you for your lipo. We went for the first meeting, and during that, you repeat the whole 2D mediacorp artistes, 3D you thing *yawns*
So be it. I told you since that day, you should inform your artiste management company about this. In case they don't agree. You told me not to worry, you'd talk to them.
Come November, one week before the scheduled date for the procedures, you told me your management company said no. Stern no. And you told me your contract with them will end in December, and you are still deciding on whether or not to renew your contract with them, so now is a good time for you to negotiate for better terms with them. If they sign you, they have to give you better offer, if not you'd just go ahead with the whole click offer, lipo, and BiB2 and be freelancing on your own etc.
That's pretty classy! Using my body and your body, subjected to go under the knife, as negotiating chips for better terms to your renewal of contract. I sure appreciate that. In the end, you pull out of the lipo. Which is totally fine by me, not my body, not my decision. You do or don't do, it doesn't bother me. And i told Click that i'd still be keen to do it on my own, having Click film it still, and i'd blog about it and that's that! The doctor was okay with this arrangement. So we arranged the dates etc. Got it rolling.
Meantime you kept telling me that you'd like to sit in, through the operation and blog about it. You told me on Twitter DM, told me on msn, told me on SMS etc. I have never once replied to that.
Not becox i'm mad at you for pulling out. Becox i'm sincerely turned off that you want to sit in, and watch me go through the boob job, so you can blog about it..
You kept telling me, "Hey Dear, i told them i'd sit in the operation and help you guys blog about it"
HELP US BLOG ABOUT IT.
Your keyword, that made yourself feel good, was HELP.
Help what? No really, enlighten me, help what?
You knew that Click will be documenting the procedure on video. I have my bf helping me snap pictures. He's a professional photographer. I am the blogger who'd blog about my own boob job experience. And i have a professional doctor who'd do the procedure. Another doctor to do my G.A. Last but not least, a nurse as a chaperon and to help in the theater room.
Now let see what i'm lacking..
OH!!! YEAH!!! ANOTHER BLOGGER WHO WANNA HELP ME BLOG ABOUT IT =DDD
That sure makes sense! *rolleyes*
So i announced on Twitter and my blog, just the night before, about going for the boob job the next day. And then immediately you DM me and text me to ask if it's actually happening tomorrow.
I didn't reply. Cox.. Er... I tweeted and blogged that it IS happening tomorrow. I mean.. What was your question for really?
And the boob job happened. I woke up from the nap at home.. And the anesthetic wore off. And it was really quite bad, the discomfort. I could barely move. Just lying on the bed. I could feel my heart beat, more obvious than ever. Or was it the throbbing pain from the boob job. I don't know.
Then i log on to Twitter and i saw your DM, "Hey dear.. How you feeling?"
I sincerely thought you care for me. So i replied you a few DMs, to tell you how the pain/ discomfort is like. And that i'm just pretty much bed-ridden for now.
Do you remember what you reply me after that? Here, "I thought i was supposed to sit in and blog about the whole procedure? What happened?"
You sent me that. When i told you how much pain i was going through. So i ask you now, what do you care about? The blog material, or me and my boob job? Only you know the answer.
So i replied, telling you that although it's a filmed thing, but it's still a proper, professional procedure. And that even my bf wasn't allowed to sit in.
And then you told me that you had arranged with them and they had agree to let you sit in to blog about it. Oh yeah, then go question whoever said yes to you. Cox i definitely wasn't informed that someone (other than the filming crew who were all female, my doctor, the nurse, the GA) is coming to see me half naked, with a camera in her hand.
So i didn't reply you after that. And you sent me another DM to say that although you are very disappointed that you didn't get to sit in to blog about it but you are still happy for me and that you know that this is something that means a lot to me, and something that i've always wanted.
Yeah well, thank you. But if you wanna talk about FEELINGS, i'd tell you i don't feel that you're even happier than a random Twitter follower who sends me his/ her well-wishing. I got hundreds of well-wishing that day. Every single one made me feel better than your "I'm disappointed i didn't get to sit in to blog about it but i'm still happy for you...."
Then later you were quite busy with your filming. And it was quite blast that show. I mean you had lots to present for your acting career in that role. And then once you came to talk to me on msn once, and you told me to go suggest to the producers of Budget Barbie to do a special episode for Little India. And you wanna be the guest/ co-host for that episode cox my viewers will definitely be able to relate since you're acting a relevant role. Yeah, that is if they view that serial drama =X
And you msn, wassap, DM me, MANY times, to put back up your blog link on my blog sidebar. I used to do HOTLINKS where i link up other people's blog, with their pictures, and i put them all on my sidebar. I removed yours. And you noticed. So yeah, your bugging me time and time again to put up your pictures, just make me NOT want to put it up more and more. And when i finally gave in to your bugging, i said, okay, send me your picture. You told me to go pick a nice one from your blog. Well, i did.. But days later.. I removed everyone. Becox i just can't stand the sight of you on my sidebar.
And then i hardly reply you. By that time i already stop picking up your calls and i hardly reply your messages and even when i do, i took 2 - 3 days to reply. You know that i don't do this to people.. Other than the people.. I wanna get away from. You should know it, i mean, since you keep talking about me like you know me so damn well =)
And then you msn me one other time later. I asked wassup and you told me
"Your dp looks very bad la =P"
"You still use it on Twitter and msn"
"Time to change it!!! You look so much better now"
"And it's been too long since we last went out to camwhore =P"
"Let's do it again!"
Half a year ago
Your filming assignments ended. You got lotsa free time on your hand. Lotsa free time for your thoughts to go wild.
You might have noticed i've been doing random things like girlie photoshoot with a few girlfriends, do silly makeup and play with wigs randomly, have parties organised by my sponsor etc. Go for events every now and then with the girls.
And i have never asked you along and you never had a problem with that, for about TWO years. You had no problem with that.
And now, after i got slightly closer to Wendy, and you have more free time on hand, you totally gone bonkers. You were angry on Twitter, complaining about why you don't get to do your liposuction and how hard is it for slightly chubbier people like you to survive in the entertainment industry.
Anyway, i don't think you're chubby. And i don't think being slightly more chubby is why you find it hard to survive. If you're having a hard time getting, or finding something, then you look within ba. Stop look outwards. That's all i'd say, i won't dish out anymore advice to you in this post, or in the future anymore.
Anyway, with all the free time on your hand, you start to get creepy. You grew sour and bitter.
The first tweet i saw was "Feel like telling somebody that whatever she has now, everything, was all linked up by me. At least have the courtesy to invite me to their event! Geez!"
You tweeted that the next day after i blogged about the event i attended with other girls, organised by my facial sponsor. Nice.
I remember i tweeted something back, but never direct it to you, something emo and angry, in chinese. LOL. I know, i'm a bit gross sometimes. Hahaha.
But i left it there and then. Until.. Days later, Geck Geck came to tell me you called her out and you were crying when you told her about how i treated you, like all the ignoring you and stuff.
Then you really don't understand me at all. I've ignored guys, ladies, ridiculous request etc.. I ignore, but i'd hardly go all out to confront and ask the person to get the fuck out of my life. And with you, i practiced A LOT Of chances, patience, but you keep pulling my hair out. I had to get away before i dislike you to a point we can never be friends again.
And i've obviously ignored you for a long time. Look at this post.. People kept commenting to ask if it's you. I deleted all of it. I thought you should know, i mean.. SINCE YOU KNOW ME SO WELL, right? And then you have to come ask me if i'm blogging about you. I told you no, becox i was sick of you at that point of time, i don't even want to give you the chance to explain your gross actions.
So IGNORING, is the best tactic that i ever mastered since a long time. I'd ignore UNTIL things gets better! That's what i do! I ignore, and if our path ever cross again next time, there might be a chance for us to get close again. BUT.
You didn't let it rest. Instead of being sad purely becox we drifted (for good reasons), you went on to tell Geck Geck that i don't even know that Budget Barbie, my facial sponsor and the boob job, was all your effort. And that you helped me get those stuff.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT? That you help me get these stuff??? Oh, i'm a nobody, that's why everyone would wanna give me all these. And in return, i'm sure i don't have to put in effort, time and thoughts to make all these happen and maintain it well. I'm sure.
After i had first-hand experience on how you deal with life (other than your love life), times and times again, i decided that you're not someone i'd like to deal with on a regular basis. Simply becox i don't like drama. I don't like confrontation. And i give chances, after chances.
I don't mind, one more friend, is always better than one less. If you had left things where it was and just get a move on with your life.. It's not like i hate you or anything, why do you have to go around telling other people about these stuff???
Geck came to me telling me you have misunderstood me quite a fair bit and encouraged me to go clear the air with you. I said no i don't want to. Cox i am still angry that you could even think that i owe everything that i worked hard for, to you.
And then we left it there. AND THEN, you went to blog a longass post about Friends.
And i quote you in your post
How, tell me how have i used you?
By photoshopping nice pictures for us, and then have you use it and watermark it as yours?
By introducing you to Click and then ended us both up on the front page of URBAN?
By putting up your bloglink with a nice picture of you on my sidebar since you first started your blog?
By agreeing to the facial sponsor meeting with you BECOX they only want to talk to BOTH of us?
And becox you told the producers of Budget Barbie that i'm good at sourcing out cheap stuff?
Is that why you think i owe everything i have to you? And that i've used you?
BTW, just to clarify, BUDGET BARBIE $100 / EPISODE idea was not yours. They had that idea long time ago, waiting for someone to fit in. FYI. So you don't have to keep thinking that that show was meant to be yours just cox you said you can do shopping show out of the 10 categories of shows you said you could host and live up to.
No it's not the popularity contest. What popularity contest? What world are you living in? Not everybody's head is full of these stuff. Perhaps you raised that point cox you and your friends think so. You keep telling me "A lot of people came to tell me you've changed too"
WELL, I AM NOT CLOSE TO A LOT OF PEOPLE WHO WILL GO TALK TO YOU ACTUALLY.
SO WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
And i'm sure the people who actually KNOWS me, will not think i've changed in the way they tell you. So i'm 100% sure that people who'd go talk to you about how i've changed, are not, and were NEVER close to me.
So why do you keep telling me that people say i've changed like it's a bigfuck point?!?!?!
It DOESN'T BOTHER ME!!!
My friends and i are still close. My boyfriend still loves me. My family loves me even more. My blog is doing fine. My doggies are healthy. SO WHAT CHANGE? And is the change bad or good? I'd say good since i'm a happier person than before.
SO WHY IS MY CHANGE A BAD THING?
What bothers me is you keep saying it like just becox YOUR side of the people told YOU i've changed (and god knows what you've said to them to make them come tell you this anyway) then i'd have to be convinced that i'm a bad person now? Doesn't make any sense.
If i were to be affected by you telling me so-and-so said what to you, therefore i should do what and what, if i had listened to everyone who buys your sob stories, i'd be a total screw-up now.
So i emailed you, and tell you that i saw your blog post about Friends and that i know you're talking about me. And i told you i'm surprised you even think that way cox i dare say i've never made use of you. EVER.
(BTW, i can insert screenshots of most of the things but this post is not for you guys, this is for YOU and you know what you did so i don't have to use screenshots to prove my points)
BUT THIS ONE, is classic.
In your reply, i quote,
OOoooOOOOoooooohhhhh. NOW WE ALL KNOW. The root and early cause of this whole saga now, is cox you want to be a part of the interesting people i mix with?!?! And you hope that i know!
YES, NOW I KNOW.
You want to friend people like Sophie, Wendy, Yutaki, Eric, Kaykay and the rest? GO FRIEND THEM YOURSELF LAH!!!!! They like you or not is another thing right??!?!?! I am not there to control their thoughts!!!
You tweet them everytime they still got reply you what! Not good enough you ask them out lah!!!
You can't put it on my tab and expect me to introduce you to all my friends, and expect them to like you right back. Right?! Besides, i never seen you keen to be a part of Mich, Zhen and myself? I never seen you keen to be a part of me, Yong Ming and Ming Zhou?!?!
And now you wanna be a part of the people i thought is more interesting. And i didn't hang out with those people cox they are more interesting, i hang out with them cox they are nice + have common topics and frequency about stuff. And we just can clique, HOW COMPLICATED you want to make this sound?!
So i left it telling you we should both go find people who influence us for the better. And told you to take care.
Three months ago
You DM me like a plea-shoutout, almost begging me to just tell you what is it exactly that i'm unhappy about. And to not treat you so coldly cox you can't take it anymore.
So i said okay, msn and we'd talk.
So we talked. And i told you 70% of what i'm unhappy about (refering to most of the stuff mention above in this post) and you either
1) deny all of it and saying that that's not your main intention
2) Saying that i think too much and read too much into things.
Okay! So let's save our time. And i'd go deal with myself, i'd be fine. I've been perfectly fine everytime, until you come disrupt my peace.
You go deal with yourself.. OH, NOT FINE. You are a human, you need reassurance, you have feelings, you can't take it that i treat you so coldly, i am someone still close to your heart.. BLABLABLA.
YEAH ALRIGHT, i get it! You want me to pretend like "Oh, i've been too sensitive this two years, i thought too badly of all her fucked-up actions, okay! She actually still treasure me a lot as a friend despite all the shit she does! Lai, let's be BFF again!!!" =DDD
It's not gonna happen.
Here are some of the things i told you during the 'showdown' and how you responded to them:
And truth to be told, D is such a nice person.. But becox you wanna validate your point that i stole something from you, you made me out to be the bad guy, but you failed. So then you make up another story, saying D said i persuaded her to sign me cox i'm a better choice. And saying that D told you i manage to swing her to my side.. You're such a dirty little liar. D was nice to BOTH of us. In fact D was one of those nice quiet girls. And you could stuff all these shit in her mouth. You win.
- I told you that part i'm unhappy with regards to the boob job saga is that you asked me how i am, i replied describing the kind of pain i was going through, instead of caring for me, you immediately jump on how upset you are that you didn't get to sit in to blog about it. And you went on questioning me about why nobody inform you. And how disappointed you are.
You told me you helped me persuade my doctor to do the boob job for me after you pulled out for lipo, OH REALLY?
My doctor is a professional and he does this to help me, purely out of goodwill, WHY WOULD HE GO LISTEN TO YOUR PERSUASION??? And then you continue to tell me you got into depression becox you felt that you let me down cox you couldn't do the lipo. Dude, your problem. Why would i be angry cox YOU can't do lipo on YOUR body? Doesn't make sense.
And then you told me you admit that you are bitter and sour becox you are angry. Angry that somehow all the good things that brushed against you, turn out to be mine. And that you ended up with nothing.
I understand your frsutration.. BUT DON'T TAKE IT OUT ON ME??? Can????
- I told you that my bf discourage me from hanging out with you for whatever reasons mentioned above in this post.
And then you were so persistent in wanting to get to his contact and talk it out with him.. I ask him on the spot while we were trashing out, he said "Don't bother lah. What for?" And i told you.
And you insist. And you insist. And then i told you what makes you think he'd be bothered to talk it out with you, when he can't even bother to talk it out with the more important people in our lives who had problems with us.
Which you, with much EVIL INTENTION, added into your blogpost dedicated to me, with details and all. How could you share something like that about my bf (who is a very private person) on your blog?!?!
And you make it seem like my bf was the largest barrier between me and you. PLEASE, it's YOU. And you never wanted to apologise for three years. Suddenly now you want to get closer again (for whatever reasons only you know) and i said no for various reasons and out of which, you wanna bang on my bf as the main reason for it?!
But i am thankful, that my bf knows and understands what kinda person we're dealing with here.
A PSYCHO.
You form your own thoughts. And you live and believe in them.
Which is all fine, i mean, i set my mind to ignore you as much as i can already. So this 'showdown' was becox you were asking for it so badly that i felt bad for you. And true to what i thought, you will not admit or even agree that you were being a less-than-nice person.
Cox you know, in your SSparkly world, you're always the nice one. Trying to be real. Trying to show your blog readers the 'truest' side of you, the real you, AS-IS *rolleyes*
Here, take this post, help yourself to it. Since they love the real you. Like they love how you paint me and my bf out to be in your post about me. They jumped on it. And they commented the worst, most nonconstructive, hurtful comments about me and Wendy. And you approved every single one of them like it's a trophy in your blogging portfolio.
I know, i seem so calm. But wait, i'm not done.
Now you're a changed person again! It's good lah! Since your "play victim" technique didn't get you far. It sure piss me off a lot when i hear it from people but that's about that. I didn't even wanna bother much about what you said. Cold, ditched you for higher grounds, done making use of you etc. Yeah, heard it all. Next time maybe filter who you tell things to.
Or did you purposely tell them so they'd come tell me?
Now you take on another approach!!! *another round of applause*
You were the middleman for some blogger event and you invited lotsa bloggers to attend. And then after that you guys hang out for a meal.
And deng deng deng~ You told everybody what?!?! You said
- I took the facial sponsorship from you becox? "You know lah, when girls hang out too much, and they start talking, this is what happens" You told them i tried to get closer to D, then persuade D to sign me and not you.
DUDE, THERE WERE TWO FUCKING CONTRACTS!!!! ONE FOR YOU, ONE FOR ME. YOU FUCKING WENT TO ACCEPT ANOTHER COMPETITOR'S OFFER, then 6 weeks later you wanna come back to this, you think what? Like your character? Can flip around and all round?!
AND YOU TOLD THEM YOU MISSED A FEW MEETINGS, OR WERE LATE, and i ended up being closer to D becox of that. Liar, you knew there were only TWO MEETINGS, and on both, you were present. Late for a bit, yes, but you were there. Say until you fucking missed out on lotsa of meeting and i had a chance to backstab you like this. Pui.
And you were so gross, you told them there's no way i could be chosen over you cox you had more readership than me at that point of time. You never had more readership than me. Fact. Why don't you tell them the truth?!?! That you chose to do competitor's brand? And then when you're done, and you wanted to come back, D didn't want to sign you. She did tell me why thou, from business point of view. It's bad for their company to just accept you over now, and it's also bad for the previous company you advertised for, if you just jump in a short period change, like that.
And i don't understand lor!!! Higher readership makes you feel good is it?! Okay that i can understand (lol), BUT COMPETING WITH YOUR FRIEND?!?!?! NI FAN BU FAN?!
Keep asking me for my stats. And even during the 'showdown', you told me you search my blog on alexa, and that my stats is doing a lot better than yours blablabla. And say that Wendy's blog is top how many. And that she really deserves a goddess title etc. Things you care about - Interesting. NOT.
- And then you told them that my bf hates you becox you had depression. HA. HA. HA. And they asked you, how is that possible cox depression is not contagious. And what did you say? "I DON'T KNOW! I am already so cham (pityful), got fucked over by my ex bf, and her bf down there don't allow her to meet me"
Oh. You don't know. But i told you during the show down what. You don't know? YOU PAISEH TO SAY, THEN DON'T SAY!!!!! When i confronted you about that, what did you say? You said "Then what do you expect me to tell them??? That i bit him?!?! That i was out of control and i drunk-drive you home?!"
NOPE. That's not what i want you to say although THAT, is the truth. I don't care about controlling you or what you are expected to say, or not to say. I'm not your mother. But if you choose to say it, tell the truth. Telling them my bf hates you cox you had depression, is as bad as, for example,
I slept with your husband, and then i slept with your son, and then i contaminate your makeup and made you grow 50 pimples, and then you slap me and scold me "SLUTWHORE I HOPE YOU DIE" after you realise. And then i go tell the whole world,
"She slapped me and then hope that i die =((( Why? I don't know~~~ Wuhoo.. ='((( I treated her as someone close to my heart.. I hope she knows that, that i still love her as a friend.. A lot. Wuhoo =(("
FUCK YOU AND YOUR CROCODILE TEARS!!!!!!!!!!1111111
You discounted and omitted all the things that happened in between. Why? Cox you feel shameful of it, maybe. I don't know. But since you told me in our confrontation wassap messages when i asked you why you told people shit about my bf, you replied "Oh excuse me? I didn't know our history is to be kept a secret"
Oh yeah? Here you go. This whole fucking blogpost just for you.
Online feuds are online feuds. But when you pull in my loved ones.. You were looking for this post, right? Bookmark it! I spent a lot of time on it. And it won't interest anyone else but you. Since your letter to me, was a blog post. I thought my letter to you, should be a blogpost too =D Yay~ This is how we roll, right?
Oh oh, that's not all! What, did you think i was gonna leave out the fact that YOU ARE A TWO-FACED BITCH?!?!?!?!?!?!
Wait, by now it should be TWO-FACED PSYCHO BITCH.
During NAPBAS, you tweeted a WHOLE lot of nice stuff to Wendy. And then when we met in the toilet, you went "女神! 女神~ 我要跟女神拍照"
YOU, CALLED HER A GODDESS, AND JUMPED SAYING YOU WANT TO SNAP PICTURES WITH HER.
Totally fine, right? And then you went on, to blog a whole lot of nice stuff about her and her winning, i quote you,
"I super major love her pink hair and full-sequinned blue dress that night. She looked a million bucks, yet still maintained a cutesy-pretty feel about her. =)"
"I was hopping so excitedly at my table in my supposedly-elegant dress that I thought I must have looked ridiculous. But I was genuinely happy that she won. I mean, come on, every single product she advertises for, SELLS. And I mean, SELL LIKE MAD kinda sell. If that is not influential, I don't know what is."
"It hasn't been an easy journey for her, but Xiaxue is where she is now, and I am truly very very happy for her. She, plus Qiuting, were my very very first inspirations to start blogging. =D"
"女王, 这个名称, 我不是乱叫, 也没有白叫. 我会永远支持你!!!!!"
OH. BUT that's not what we heard!!! Was it? What did you tell those bloggers?
You told them that Wendy will be a nobody if not for her being popular online. Cox she's so short and unnoticeable in real life. And that's why she have to dye blonde and now, pink hair.
So you said you don't understand what is there for her to be so yaya-papaya about. And that she's so arrogant cox you tried so many times to be friends with her but she always gave you this attitude.
What got into you........ I mean you're psychotic, bitchy, mean and act like the one with a bigger heart all the time, BUT NOW YOU ALSO DO LIES????
You wanna lie about such stuff??? You lie about me and how i snatch things from you to people, and you lie about my bf hating you for the wrong reason, and then now you wanna be two-faced about how you feel for Wendy?!?!?!
On all the occasions that Wendy met you, i was there. And btw CNY open house, SHE WAS FUCKING FRIENDLY with EVERYONE lah!!!!!!! Even the bloggers whom she had saga with previously, she still spoke to them during poker and card game. As much as she spoke to you.
That aside, why, she must be extra friendly to you is it? Cannot accept that in life, not everyone will adore you, is it? What is wrong with you! People never reciprocate your friendship then you like this talk shit about people.
If you truly like and admire somebody, you don't start to talk shit of that person just becox you tried to be friends and she didn't show you back the same kind of friendliness you shown to her.
You don't say nonsense like "I like her personality and her blog but can't say the same about her character thou" Yeah, but in your blogpost on NAPBAS, you said you will FOREVER SUPPORT HER???
In your blogpost about me, you even dare say i twisted your words from the conversation you had with those bloggers, then tell Wendy another story about you. Haha, you think i'm you ah?
I can't name names of the others who told me details about what you told them that day, and on other occasions where you met them, but Yutaki came to tell me to clear the air with you cox you seem really unhappy about me and the past. But he doesn't know what happened between me and you in the past so he don't want me to know about what he heard that day. Cox i've never told him about it. And he was afraid that if he told me that you told everybody, i'd get major pissed.
So he just say ask me to talk to you since you have lotsa misunderstanding about me and Wendy. And i'm sure he has his own way of looking at it but..
YUTAKI IS FINALLY STEPPING OUT TO SAY WHAT EXACTLY HE HEARD THAT DAY!!!!!!!
I'm sure you don't need to read lah, you definitely remember what you said. And what Yutaki blogged about, triangulates with what the others told me, so who could the liar be but you?!?!?!
Telling them that D and i got close becox you were late on several occasions?!?!?! REALLY?!?! WE ONLY HAD TWO MEETINGS. And you CHOSE not to sign the contract and go do competitor's advert first. Now you blame me and D for it. Really.. You.. Are hopeless.
And telling them i'm angry about you not being able to do lipo with me while i do boob job?!?! Bitch, i told you EXACTLY what i'm unhappy about during the showdown.. What's your point of begging for me to tell you why i'm unhappy, and then you go tell people another story?
YOU SAID WHAT, YOU MEANT WHAT.
YOU DID WHAT, YOU MEANT WHAT.
Okay? Don't try to cook up a subtle and gentle side of what you said as an excuse for all the shit you said behind people's back.
Everytime in your post/ wassap, you start off righteous and angry and then you wanna end of with "no hard feelings", "I don't want any more drama", "You still have a special place in my heart"
WELL, I'D TELL YOU WHAT, if i'm like what your post made me out to be, so awful and manipulative and mean and no sense of self, and copies Wendy etc, if i'm so bad, i say you give that slot to someone else.
Please, give it away, please.
And before this ends, i wanna talk about your godsis and Wendy's incident. You brought this up during the lunch with the rest of the bloggers. When you were talking about how arrogant Wendy is. I think you thought that this would prove your point that Wendy is truly an arrogant person.
Here's what happened, AND I BET YOUR GUTS, even your godsis can't remember it well.
Your godsis didn't went to pick up leaves on the grass patch (as what she commented and then disclaim that she can't remember exactly what happened), she was packing up some rubbish on the floor in the studio/ office cox we just had McDee and some people were still eating, but she was just clearing up the rest of the bits of rubbish hanging around that wasn't placed inside the rubbish bag yet.
Which is really a nice gesture!!! I agree!!!
And then a girl asked her "Why you keep clearing up those stuff!"
And your godsis went "职业病".
Which means it's a habit she picked up in her job.
Stupid answer. Nobody knows that you're a producer who habitually packs and organised stuff lah okay, anyway you said in the filming profile that you're an aspiring singer. Then how we know?!
So Wendy jokingly said "Huh, 你的职业是清洁工人啊?"
The joke was there!!! She had to go for it! I mean, what other job could her job be if she said cleaning rubbish is something she picked up in her job? And NO, nobody thinks it's a kind of discrimination to joke that her being a cleaner is of negative reference. Why? You ownself think being a cleaner is very low is it? That's why offended?
Had your godsis been posing, and people ask, "Why you keep posing!" and she say 职业病, and then Wendy reply "You're a model huh!" THEN HOW? NOT OFFENSIVE AND RUDE ANYMORE?
*rolleyes*
It's not like your godsis IS a cleaner, and yet Wendy go poke fun of it. CLEARLY, she is not. So i don't see why you guys have to kick up a storm, for something small that happened months ago.
And everyone laughed over it. But of course to you, Silver, it's a big deal right? Something that you can blow up and feed on, when people agree with you that Wendy is a rude and arrogant person.
You godsis called you to briefly whine about it, and then you took this and make a big deal out of it at the conversation with the bloggers.
And after you're done, WHAT DID YOUR GODSIS SAY???
Yes i'm sure it hurt her and scarred her as much as you made it up to sound like.
I'm not here to prove to the whole world that you did this this and this. I'm here to remind you of the things you did.. To remind yourself of all the things that you conveniently forget, to be able to think of yourself as a victim now.
Whatever you do.. Stop cooking stories and then play victim. I'm not gonna end this as nice as you did. Truth be told, i did this post JUST FOR YOU. To leave me alone and to get out of my life. You did so many things and you could flipped words around just so they work in your advantage.
I kept quiet through the months and didn't blog a single shit about it nor approve a single comment telling me you blogged about me in your Friends post.. Becox i thought ignoring you.. Would make you leave quietly.
If you honestly think that our friendship means so much, that letter on your blog now would have been an actual email in my inbox now.
But you chose to put it on your blog, and said all these shit (mostly untrue) and then pull in my bf. And want people to look at him like he's this petty, old and sad man.
You lost your special place in my heart when you invited me to go on a yacht with a rich guy in the gaming industry who invited you and one of your sizzling hot girlfriend on the yacht set sail for a luxury resort in Bali for just the three of us.
Thank you for telling me that "when he said hot girlfriend i immediately thought of you =)" but no thanks to such indecent proposal when you know i'm attached to this petty, old and sad bf.
And, last thing, you said so much about how you see a lot of Wendy's style in my blogpost, the way i do advertorial and even the way i photoshop my pictures, you told me so much advice on how to blog and be myself over wassap, and on your blogpost. I'm thankful!
But i'm not the one having to spun stories, tell lies, twist facts and omit shameful details about myself, just so i can get barely over 2 thousand hits from my daily 700 - 800 hits.
Let's look at our motives individually for wanting to start this saga now lah, okay.
- Like you said in your email, you want to be a part of the interesting people i mix with for whatever reason i don't know, and for a fact that it seems like it's not happening, or not happening soon enough, you decided to take another approach, this saga.
- You whole freaking time so super care about blog stats, even went to Alexa search me and Wendy etc, so i guess you wanted this so you could have your stats go up. Look at the graph! Wendy tweeted your name, and your stats went from 700/800 to 2000! You blogged shit about me, and your stats went from 1400 up to 2200 again! Congrats! Now that i blogged about you, your stats went to? 8000+. And yet you still keep taunting me and Wendy on your Twitter.
- You mentioned to me during the 'showdown' that your acting/ hosting gig request is decreasing and the income is really low. And that you can barely survive on it. So now you are keen to take up blogshop adverts, and that's why you told me to send you the template on how i charge. I guess you think this fame can make you call for more money from advertisers.
My motives for creating all these saga with you:
OH, NOTHING~ Cox I wasn't the one creating saga!!!!! You talk shit about people to so many people, and then we tweet to ask you to stop it, cannot?!??! I didn't even mentioned names!!! Yes Wendy did but DID YOU NOT SAY SHIT ABOUT HER TO BLOGGERS?!?!?!?
SEE YUTAKI'S POST!!!!!!!
You did! And this is not the only bunch of people you tell to. ADMIT IT. We just don't want to name names like you did during our wassap conversation. At first sign of me confronting you, you mentioned FOUR NAMES. One of which is Brad (ladyironchef) but he's how fucking innocent in this case please. He only met you once and he didn't even say anything about you to me. And then when you finally admit to saying stuff, you quickly pointed out that Christine and Yutaki and Brad also said a lot of shit about me and Wendy as well. Sigh..
I honestly do not believe that Xtine said anything with mean/ evil intention like you did. She was probably commenting, gossip session, expected. No biggie. BUT LOOKS WHO'S COMMANDING and manipulating the gossip session, and leading people to believe what she wants them to believe? YOU. Yet you go dish out other people's name when being exposed.
YOU ARE A LOUSY PERSON. So stop offering the special spots in your heart (which is not that big lah, please. Big hearts don't go for dramas like you have been dashing for) to people.
I guess you can also keep the advice you have for me about my blogging, to yourself. Run out of things to say shit about me? SIMPLE, pick the one that people always pick on me about, that i copy Wendy. If you're so into originality, stop asking me to send you my template on how to quote blogshops. You asked once when you started blogging, then you asked once more right after the showdown.
And then out of nowhere, you're doing magatorial too! Nise!!! It's okay, don't have to credit magatorial to me even thou i strung that word together =)
I will not respond to any of your blogpost after this, or discreet tweetacks/ sad tweets directing for me to see etc. Becox reading your tweets is like watching you act, so unnatural. I QUOTE YOU AGAIN, you tweeted "Sorry, I don't know how to tweet sarcastic/horrible/nasty things abt u the way u can about me. I just cannot bring myself to do it."
BITCH PLEASE, YOU ALREADY DID SO, ON SEVERAL OCCASIONS, blog shit, twice, tweet shit, freaking so many times! I know you're tweeting those to show people how much exactly you value me even though you write so much shit about me on your blog (confusing).
Now, tell me, when was the last time you had your mental state checked? You need professional help. Tell your doctor "Wuhoo.. Everybody is against me.. I just wanna be friends! Qiuting is so mean! Wuhoo.. =((" URGH. SAVE IT.
How long will the anti-xx and anti-me feed on this? You interesting enough ma? Not interesting enough for the long run, you gotta find something else to bang on already. I mean, afterall Wendy and i both gave our best to you liao.
Oh and.. You keep saying Wendy 'took' me away from you. No she didn't.
I walked away. Too slowly apparently. I mean look at how long this worthless post is.
"Wow! *clap clap* Mediacorp has trained you well. Talk about twisting everything to become sinister and creating the world's biggest pity party for yourself.
Aren't you the saddest little dimpled girl just wanting to be a true friend to others?
But here's what I think, reading between the lines. First, let's talk about the "depression". Please don't insult that word with your boyfriend melodrama. Dating married men and feeling so sad? Oh honey, were you the victim who deserves true love? Please, depression is a medical condition. Yours is just you seeking attention, perhaps training to be the next Best Actress. If God exists, he wont torture the next decent man by introducing you to his life.
Then you talk about Qiuting's bf as if he is the main catalyst in the destruction of your oh so precious friendship. That he is the world's pettiest man, refusing to "clear the air" with you, and of course you validate this by exposing that he is in bad terms with his own relatives, something Qiuting told you in confidence.
She has always been very private about her bf. If you are a true friend as you claim, you should know better than to talk about him against her wishes, moreover exposing little secrets she told you. Have you thought about jeopardising her relationship with him if he reads your post? "Why did you tell Silver about my relatives?" - Noooo... You don't care, you just want to play the victim. Why don't you post his pictures while you are at it? That should piss Qiu off, she deserves it, doesn't she?
You wished to clear the air with Qiuting's bf. Why would he want to clear the air with you after you fucking bit him like a psycho bitch? You are NOBODY to him, there is nothing to salvage or fix. You showed him your true colours and he decided he doesn't like you. That's that. Sometimes people don't want to fix stuff because... Well why bother to fix a $1 chair? After fixing it's probably worth $0.20 - not worth the trouble.
You write as if Qiuting decided to stop being friends with you because her bf forbade her. Have you considered perhaps she was just using that an excuse to stop hanging out with you because you are a shitty person?
And then the two other reasons - XX and Click, combined with Qiu's rising popularity, made her so arrogant that she decided to neglect you. No. Sure, she did become friends with XX and got more popular, but she started to neglect you just then because it became more and more apparent you were jealous and uncomfortable with her fame, which was beginning to eclipse yours. You also idolised XX, but XX chose to be friends with Qiu and not you. Dammit, you were a celebrity first, what happened? Why should people pay more attention to that flat-chested girl than you?
You became toxic. She didn't change... you did. Nobody wants to deal with a green-eyed monster who puts them down all the time. You just chose to believe you had no part to play the demise of the friendship.
Speaking of friendship - it is so easy to just keep going on and on about how sad you are to lose this one. Were you a true friend to her?
What have you done for her, really, to make it such that she should have tried her best to salvage her friendship with you because it's so worth it and you are so fantastic as a friend?
Did you visit her after her boob job to see if she is ok, or buy food for her to heal quickly? Or were you just sulking, sour you didn't get to sit in on her surgery to get a slice of the attention pie? She complains about migraines - have you even googled remedies to help her deal with her pain or introduced good doctors to her?
And now you paint her as this worthless, fame-seeking, grovelling lackey with a petty crazy boyfriend for the world to see. Are you pleased with the comments insulting her? Feels good?
A fantastic friend you are indeed, someone should give you a fucking trophy for your efforts. Now you see why everybody wants to be friends with you! XX and Qiuting must be idiots"
WELL SAID!!!!!! Why did i bother blogging this whole shit man, that comment would have summarised my blogpost!
And why you like this! People say i lackey and that you're prettier than me, you approve. They say hope that Wendy will never be able to reproduce, you approve. They say shit about you, you no approve. That's not nice! Please learn how to respect people's feelings leh. Trollololol.
Okay it's not like i look forward to putting this post up, it's about 12,000 - 13,000 words long, nobody is keen. So i don't look forward to it. But since you wanna be so insane, and keep pretending by telling people you don't know why we drifted, and tried to push it to my bf, to Wendy, to the change in me after i got close to Wendy etc. NOW THIS POST, shall serve as a reminder. Each time you wanna think "I'm so innocent~ I don't know! I didn't do anything! I was young! Wuhoo.. =((" THEN YOU READ THIS AGAIN BA.
By the way, YOUNG is not an excuse to all the shit you did. However young at whichever point of time you were at, remember i was two years and 13 days younger than you. Now stop sulking.
When i knew from your comments that you were coming up with a closure post, i thought you would at least apologise to Wendy for talking shit about her to people. But no.. You went on to talk more shit about me then wanna sign off with telling me i still hold a sepcial place in your heart. Now i know why your heart whole fucking day kena hurt, COX YOU KEEP WHORING IT OUT and it loses its worth.
Please, if it's so close to your heart, keep it close, keep it hush, keep it within you and the other party. Don't whore it on Twitter and your blog. After the confrontation, you admitted that you said stuff about my bf and then said you'd just shut up next time if people ask about our history. But look what you did next? Put up a Letter to a Dear Friend.. Filled with insults and your own self-pity and pulling my bf into this.. Tsk.. You've crossed the line. And i tweeted this, you know it's for you..
Okay. You know what will make this cool despite it being worthless to most of you who are not the ones involved? If i seal my 7 years story with..
But despite the low demand for it, i'd put in 200% heart just so that i can share the truth, once and for all. And not have to deal with drama anymore when people come tell me a different story that they heard, each time.
So Silver blogged a longass post about me.
Now brace yourselves, becox..
And it's based on a true story. No no, it IS, in fact, a true story.
7 years ago
When we first met at the school pageant, i already thought you were a charming, attractive and confident lady. Your moves were so swift. Everybody likes you. And then we started off with SMS-ing each other more after you graduate. And then we hang out to meet for the first time. It was at night. Like late night.
You had problems with your relationship. I listened.
Months down the road, i had my first bf turn out to be an asshole. You listened. And then i listened to yours.
And then i listened to yours. And then.. I listened to yours. When we meet up, we only meet up during the night time. Sometimes we sit in your car. Once we went to Mustafa. Once while waiting for your other half to contact you, i invited you to bunk in with me at my parents' place. My sisters and mother all thought you were so pretty! Everybody likes you. And it comes so naturally.
Sometimes we sit in the 7-11 at bencoolen. Sometimes we laugh. Sometimes we cry. Most of the time, we sing in your car. I'm sure our emotions were raw. We had lots to offer despite the rejections we get. They can hurt us but we dared to Love. We.. were young.. I admire you a lot, for how much you can love your other-half, with no reservation.
And then i recovered from the heartbreak with the help of my other girlfriends.
Same time, you had some competition at the TV station. I helped pass out tickets to your fans sometimes. I was so proud of you. I thought you'd go places.
And then through that competition, you met your next bf. And you continue seeing him for another 2 years or so, you were flying, you were fine. We don't meet up that often anymore though we sometimes keep in touch over SMS. Which is good! Cox that means you're doing fine, i'd assume.
4 years plus ago
Then your relationship became shaky. You asked me out. We went for karoake that night. You drank quite a bit. You sang til you cry. Then you wanted to send me home. I said we should take a cab. You said no, and you insisted. I was foolish enough to go along.
We were on a straight road but you went left and you went right.. And we almost bang into something, twice. I think there must be a reason why we both survived til today to do this trash out. I asked myself too, why did i let that happen. Endangering both of us that night. But you were so.. Wild with emotions.
We got to my place somehow. We chatted for a bit more and i asked you to stay over. You said no and then you said
"Alright.. You should go back in.. At least you have someone in there, waiting for you to go home.."
"Unlike me.. I have nobody.."
And then you started crying and..
BOR-BOR-BOR-BOR-BOR-BOR-BOOORRRRRRRRRRR!!!!
Yeah, that was you banging your head on the steering wheel horn.
So i held you tight so that you can't move forward to do that again. And we both cried and..
KONG-KONG-KONG-KONG-KONG!!!
Yeah, that was you banging your head on the car window.
So i had to hold you tighter. I mean jokes aside, i felt your sadness. I did. And next you fist punch your own head. And i manage to calm you down after that.. For a while.
So in the short while that i have, i called my boyfriend to come out and help me help you inside.
He came out. I got out of the car too, with your handbag, so that i could go over to your side to help.
He opened the car door. Said hello to you. And he reached his hand to take your car key so that you can't drive off and hit someone down along the way or injure yourself. So that we could all get into the house.. And you went
AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
The effort you put into your singing lessons, they paid off. So you screamed. Like. Really. Loudly.
And within split seconds you started hitting and punching him and then you pulled his hand closer and then you know this part,
YOU WENT ON TO BITE MY BOYFRIEND.
So you bit him on the fingers and then you snatch the keys away from him and then you drove off.
So i needed to call someone. And i took out your handphone. I called your mum, she didn't pick up. Then i called your home, nobody picked up. So left with no choice, i had to call your bf, who was staying less than 5 minutes away from my house at the time.
Within minutes, you drove back for your handbag. I refuse to give it to you. I told you to come out of the car and stay for one night. You didn't want to. And then your bf came..
And you saw him and you screamed at me "WHY DID YOU CALL HIM!!! I TRUSTED YOU!!! I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY FRIEND!!!! WHY DID YOU CALL HIM!!! WHY DID YOU CALL HIM!!! WHY~~AAAAHHHAHHHHHHHH!!!!"
And then i sat outside my house with my boyfriend.. Just watching your car bouncing up and down, with you inside knocking, kicking and hitting on anything you can.. And him holding you down and getting punched and hit by you every now and then. Since we're talking about it now, i'd like you to know that, i too think that he totally deserve it. This one, we're on the same track.
And then occasionally there will be the BORBORBORBORBOR and then the KONGKONGKONGKONG and AHHHHHHHHHHHHH~
If i was watching a movie in the theater, i probably got the best view plus the most supreme sound system then.
IF ONLY IT WASN'T 1.30AM AT NIGHT.
IF ONLY WE DIDN'T HAVE NEIGHBOURS SLEEPING ACROSS THE STREET AND BESIDE OUR SHOPHOUSE.
So the first police car with two policemen arrived..
You were just stoning. Not replying much of their questions. But when they turn their back to talk to me, you started your drama again.
So then came two more police car with four policemen.
You really draw crowds. No, you do. You gotta keep that. Haha.
And the police wanted to bring you back to detain you for until you're at least sober/ calm before taking your statement.
I asked, SHIVERING, I SWEAR, "Can you please not?" =OOO Fuck, that's extreme courage dude!!! I REQUESTED TO DENY A POLICEMAN'S INSTRUCTION! Watch out, we got a badass over here!!
Lolol.
So the police asked me how can he leave you here when you are in such a violent condition.
And i cried. HAHAHA. I don't know!!! I was just so scared that they'd take you away to some shitty lock up and then you might hate me for that, forever!!! So i cried!!! And i said "But she'd be fine.. She's just a little upset with the bf, that's all"
And then the police didn't agree or disagree to not bring you back to the station.
He digress to ask me a question that made me stutter.
"Was she drunk-driving?"
=OOOOOOO I'm thinking inside me, FUCK THIS SHIT I'M NOT DOING THIS!!!!!!! I'm not gonna lie but i'm not gonna say the truth and get you into trouble!!!!!!!
So i said "By the time she got worked up, the car was already here. So she sat in there and she became really agitated when the boyfriend came"
I am so smart =D I siam-ed the policeman's question and told him something else to divert his attention lolol, which was, still the truth =DDD But i didn't lie! Lol. But i was stuttering so badly and sweating like a pig cox i was so scared O.O
In my head, there was only one thing.. The police have to go. Cox 1) You cannot go get lock up. Cox your debut single album was gonna release next week and you cannot have these nonsense happening to you at that time 2) Fts, i don't wanna be the bad guy! If you really got taken away outside my house, it'd be like i am the one who let the police take you wtf. No, i don't want to take that under my name!
And the police told me 10 minutes later "Are you sure i can leave her with you? Becox if she gets hurt, or if she hurts someone, the responsibility will be on you. Becox i want to bring her back to the police station and you don't want this to happen. So you gonna be held responsible if anything happen, do you understand this?"
So i said "Okay, yeah, i'm sure she'd be okay"
Right after i said that, me and all the policemen turned to look at you, you were knocking your head against the window still. Haha. It was dramatically funny. So i said,
"Err.... Maybe not now. But later, she'd be fine later"
The policemen all left. They had stayed for around 40 minutes. Pretty long. Too long.
I sat by the koi pond.. With my bf.. Just watching you and your bf in the car. We didn't dare to go in. In case you guys need us to help you with something. And most of the time you're just crying and shouting at him.. Next you guys hug.. And then the cycle goes on..
At 4.21am, he hand signaled to us, to tell us to go in and gave us a okay sign.
I am not so sure.. We went up and i was watching your car from there, until he drove you off.
And then too soon, 6am came, my bf had to go prepare for work. I'm more lazy, i called control center earlier on to cancel my flight. Reporting at 6.15am would mean i have to get ready at 4.30am. Lol. Not gonna make it.
And i text you the next day.. And the next day.. And the next day.. You didn't reply. So i had to ask your bf who then, soon became ex bf. He really didn't treat you right but at least he could assure me that you are physically safe and he told me to give you some time alone.
Months passed. No news.
My bf didn't fancy me hanging out with you in the future cox he thinks it's really selfish and inconsiderate, reckless and immature of you to put me and you through the danger of drunk-driving and then later create all these scene when you were already not drunk-drunk anymore.
And i remember weeks after the incident, he once asked me, "Did she call you? To apologise or anything of sort?"
So it's not like he didn't want to 'FORGIVE'. He did look forward to what you have to say. But you never came along with it in time.
3 Years Ago
I joined a TV competition. Towards the end, you got in touch. The first time i saw you after not meeting you for ages.. Was at my 21st birthday gathering they organised for me. After the gathering we went for yakun toast at the airport. Great to finally see you in a time zone other than during wee hours.
It was different. It felt different. I thought.. Maybe it's just normal, since we haven't got in touch for so long. And that incident happened. None of us spoke about it. I actually thought you should apologise to my bf at least, if not us both. But of course, the valid time frame for an apology would be a few months after the incident. And we were way passed that.
I was okay with you. If not, i wanted to be okay with you again. I wanted the friendship to work again.
And my bf knows that. Although he doesn't give the widest smile when i talk about you but he respect that i still wanted you as a friend then.
And somewhere along the way, i started this blog.
2 years ago
Then you started your blog! I was happy for you and for myself mainly! Cox i could catch up on your thoughts and your happenings. I even linked you up on the sidebar with your picture, told people to visit, who cares if i only had 500 readers a day! It doesn't matter! It wouldn't matter between us, i thought.
Then i told you i wanna go camwhore at Haji Lane. And you said you'd join, you need picture for your blogbanner anyway. So we went. And we camwhored a lot. I photoshopped all the pictures and you're free to use them. But you watermarked all the pictures with your blog address. And then you sent that whole big bunch of pictures from your camera to me for me to photoshop them for you. They are like 80% your camwhoring shots.. Say whaaat?
Yes you did blog about how watermarking pictures can draw some people to your blog, if someone chooses to use your picture and their readers might be curious and then will go visit your blog etc. I know.. Hits are important to you. I know. You always look to climb, you always talk about how you wanna move forward in life, be bigger things. Go further miles. It's good that you're so ambitious.
But really, this is a friendly advice, please don't watermark your blog address on pictures that are not yours. Haha. When we went to meet Liu Qian the magician, you did that too. And on many other occasions, You took the pictures i took and that i photoshopped, that i put on my blog, you took it and watermark it with your blog address. I mean you probably didn't think much of it, but since you have so many advice for me on your blog, this is one friendly advice for you =)
Then the post i blogged about to retaliate hateful comments got picked up and got blown out of proportion, about me wanting a boob job sponsor if there is a clinic who's keen. I got slammed and flamed by STOMP, by netizens, by the newspaper.. Calling me a begger. Begging people for things. It wasn't exactly happy time.
When we were talking about it.. I was trying to be positive, and i said, "Haiyah, whatever lah. They want to give me news.. I take it as bad news is better than no news lor" and you told me that it's not bad, saying something controversial and then driving lotsa traffic to the blog. I said yeah, but it's traffic leaving nasty comments and it'd die down anyway.
And you told me to imagine if a kids' show TV host like yourself, were to even say anything vaguely vulgar on the blog, people will go mad jumping on you and your language and how inappropriate it is.
NEXT THING YOU DID, you shifted your birthday wish list post that was moving down to the previous pages, back to the top post, opening acceptance to anyone who wish to send you gifts.
And then the next post (still below the birthday wish list post cox you scheduled the post to be the top post for quite a while), you posted a long angry post, filled with expletives and vulgar language to the core, asking whoever owes you money to return you the sum. Even putting in their full names.
Like i said.. It's good for me that you started blogging.. Becox if not, i'd never known you past your heartbreaks.. And past how you deal with your love relationships. I've only seen you vulnerable.. I've hardly seen how you react to things and how you handle things on normal day-to-day basis.
I don't know what's your favourite food. I don't know what's your favourite colour. I don't know much about you. Except that you are someone with a lot of drive in you. Always ready to take a step forward in whatever things you want, you get.
1.5 year ago
I went for an audition at Clicknetwork. They asked me if i would be keen in doing Bored in Bikinis 2. I said i might consider ONLY if i have boobs to start with if not i'd never wear a bikini. And they knew about the asking for boob job sponsor on blog hooha, so they casually ask, "If we could find you a boob job sponsor, you'd consider doing BiB2?" I said, yeah find me the sponsor first! LOL.
And then they ask me if i were to do BiB2, do i have an ideal partner in mind who is of the same frequency as me.
So i told them about you. They asked me, what are you good at.. I told them you're really pretty. And you speak really well. And you're good with hosting, and that you've hosted several TV programs before. And you can sing too. And you used to fly, so i'm sure you'd have some good knowledge about beauty/ skincare and whatnots.
Few weeks later, you went down for your audition. They told you about the boob job i'm looking at and then you said you'd like to do liposuction then you'd do BiB2. And you told them you could do all sort of genre of shows. Travel, food, beauty, music, shopping, lifestyle, anything. And they asked you what do you think i'm good at, you said i could buy cheap stuff and make them look good. Thank you.
Later clicknetwork was interviewed in an article on Straits Times URBAN. About new personalities online who dare to bare and flash for attention.
So Clicknetwork introduced both of us to be interviewed. The article is about me wanting boob job and you wanting lipo before we do BiB2. And we both got onto the front page of URBAN. That was neat. And becox of that, people look at us as a pair. Like a BFF blogging buddy.
Not long later, i started doing Budget Barbie. My blog daily unique readers went from 700 (thanks to URBAN, it jumped and increased by 200 steadily) to 1500 instantly. You will constantly ask me what my stats is. So that's how i remember then. That i was 1500 when you were 700.
And then a skincare/ beauty company marketing girl, D, asked you to arrange for a meetup, with me and her. Woah this part, is complicated.
D used to be from another makeup company by the way, and she emailed me before she jumped to this skincare/ beauty company. And i couldn't make it to her event but i did say she could contact me next time if there are other events.
But you went for that makeup event and that's how you two got each other's contact.
And one day you called me saying D's company ask you to arrange a meet up with me, you and her cox her company wanna re-brand and wants to contract us as their online ambassadors.
I told you, "It sounds good! You go ahead ba. I don't think i wanna be tied down to one brand"
I'm sorry i lied.
My face was in a ultimate disastrous condition at that time. Look. Lol. So i badly needed a facial/ skincare sponsor. But i said no to you becox you've done all these things recently that i mentioned above, that i thought i don't quite like.
So then you said okay, and later you call me back. You said you called D and she say she'd still prefer to speak to both of us at one time. So i said okay in that case, I'd go.
And so we went. During the first meeting, all the terms were discussed. Then D went back to send a confirmation over email to both of us. Then she prepared the contract, email it for both of us to go through, we had no problem with it. So so we arrange for a second meeting to sign the contract.
RIGHT HERE WAS WHERE YOU BECAME REALLY, REALLY ANNOYING.
We were having lunch and casual convo, D and her associate, me and you. And then you were saying how much NN offered to pay you per advertorial if you sign your blog with them. So i said, "WOW. That sounds like a super good deal lah!!! Sign lor! What's holding you back!"
And you said, "Yeah, it's not bad right? I mean.. Look at you, it's better than you having to do like what..? Five? Or Seven? Five to seven ads before you can earn the same amount"
Awkward silence..
And then i said, "Yeah, but those are blogshop ads, need much lesser effort as compared to the proper full length adverts lah"
And you say "Yeah, but still.."
"And anyway i can't really do blogshop ads cox my blog is more like a artiste's blog so not so nice"
And then we went on to talk about blogging in general. I LOVE THIS PART THE MOST. It's the most unbelievable part before i realise more unbelievable parts later on.
You went on to say what kind of blogger you are.
"I'm very different as a blogger.. In the sense.. I am also an artiste.. So if you look at Joanne Peh, Felicia Chin, Jeanette Aw's blogs, when you look at their blogs, it's always safe, prim and proper.. Mainly about updates of their up and coming shows.. Some behind-the-scene shots.. That's about it. It's very 2-Dimensional.
But when you come to my blog. You see me for who i am. AS-IS. Yes you might have seen me on TV as a village girl, as a lawyer, or even as a rape victim, but when you go to my blog.. It's a totally different side of me that you see. It's more 3D. I am just who i am, and i can blog about all these things that the rest of the artiste don't. So in this sense i'm very distinguished as a blogger or as an artiste."
*round of applause*
Nice marketing speech for yourself after putting me down.
By the way, you were probably feeling insecure then cox you asked me for my stats and i told you i have 1500 daily and you told me oh, not bad, you are a 700 but moving upward. But do you have to do this? Cox we were each offered a contract.
It's not like we have to hardsell ourselves to fight for that one contract. So i really don't know why you have to do that. Remember after that in the night time, we were sitting at the coffeeshop around my place? You asked me what's my blog stats again. And i told you the same.. 1.5k daily.
And then i signed the contract that day itself. You said you have to bring it back for your artiste manager to go through. So you didn't sign it. We were each offered $2k cash, $7 worth of services, for a one year contract.
Within a week, you told me you are not going to sign the contract with D's company cox you were offered another skincare/ beauty blog assignment from another company. $1.2k for 6 weeks of weekly blogging. So you told me that you'd take up that $1.2k for 6 weeks first cox the money is better, the term of contract is shorter, and when it's done and over with, you'd come join me at D's offer.
Both companies are doing almost the same things, offering almost the same services, selling their own products. And you wanna take up the offer from the other company cox the money is better given that's only for 6 weeks, it's fine, that's your choice.
When D was informed by you, she told me that in that case, we could proceed with the ambassadorship with me alone first. And so we did.
Then clicknetwork found us a keen sponsor who was willing to help me for my boob job and you for your lipo. We went for the first meeting, and during that, you repeat the whole 2D mediacorp artistes, 3D you thing *yawns*
So be it. I told you since that day, you should inform your artiste management company about this. In case they don't agree. You told me not to worry, you'd talk to them.
Come November, one week before the scheduled date for the procedures, you told me your management company said no. Stern no. And you told me your contract with them will end in December, and you are still deciding on whether or not to renew your contract with them, so now is a good time for you to negotiate for better terms with them. If they sign you, they have to give you better offer, if not you'd just go ahead with the whole click offer, lipo, and BiB2 and be freelancing on your own etc.
That's pretty classy! Using my body and your body, subjected to go under the knife, as negotiating chips for better terms to your renewal of contract. I sure appreciate that. In the end, you pull out of the lipo. Which is totally fine by me, not my body, not my decision. You do or don't do, it doesn't bother me. And i told Click that i'd still be keen to do it on my own, having Click film it still, and i'd blog about it and that's that! The doctor was okay with this arrangement. So we arranged the dates etc. Got it rolling.
Meantime you kept telling me that you'd like to sit in, through the operation and blog about it. You told me on Twitter DM, told me on msn, told me on SMS etc. I have never once replied to that.
Not becox i'm mad at you for pulling out. Becox i'm sincerely turned off that you want to sit in, and watch me go through the boob job, so you can blog about it..
You kept telling me, "Hey Dear, i told them i'd sit in the operation and help you guys blog about it"
HELP US BLOG ABOUT IT.
Your keyword, that made yourself feel good, was HELP.
Help what? No really, enlighten me, help what?
You knew that Click will be documenting the procedure on video. I have my bf helping me snap pictures. He's a professional photographer. I am the blogger who'd blog about my own boob job experience. And i have a professional doctor who'd do the procedure. Another doctor to do my G.A. Last but not least, a nurse as a chaperon and to help in the theater room.
Now let see what i'm lacking..
OH!!! YEAH!!! ANOTHER BLOGGER WHO WANNA HELP ME BLOG ABOUT IT =DDD
That sure makes sense! *rolleyes*
So i announced on Twitter and my blog, just the night before, about going for the boob job the next day. And then immediately you DM me and text me to ask if it's actually happening tomorrow.
I didn't reply. Cox.. Er... I tweeted and blogged that it IS happening tomorrow. I mean.. What was your question for really?
And the boob job happened. I woke up from the nap at home.. And the anesthetic wore off. And it was really quite bad, the discomfort. I could barely move. Just lying on the bed. I could feel my heart beat, more obvious than ever. Or was it the throbbing pain from the boob job. I don't know.
Then i log on to Twitter and i saw your DM, "Hey dear.. How you feeling?"
I sincerely thought you care for me. So i replied you a few DMs, to tell you how the pain/ discomfort is like. And that i'm just pretty much bed-ridden for now.
Do you remember what you reply me after that? Here, "I thought i was supposed to sit in and blog about the whole procedure? What happened?"
You sent me that. When i told you how much pain i was going through. So i ask you now, what do you care about? The blog material, or me and my boob job? Only you know the answer.
So i replied, telling you that although it's a filmed thing, but it's still a proper, professional procedure. And that even my bf wasn't allowed to sit in.
And then you told me that you had arranged with them and they had agree to let you sit in to blog about it. Oh yeah, then go question whoever said yes to you. Cox i definitely wasn't informed that someone (other than the filming crew who were all female, my doctor, the nurse, the GA) is coming to see me half naked, with a camera in her hand.
So i didn't reply you after that. And you sent me another DM to say that although you are very disappointed that you didn't get to sit in to blog about it but you are still happy for me and that you know that this is something that means a lot to me, and something that i've always wanted.
Yeah well, thank you. But if you wanna talk about FEELINGS, i'd tell you i don't feel that you're even happier than a random Twitter follower who sends me his/ her well-wishing. I got hundreds of well-wishing that day. Every single one made me feel better than your "I'm disappointed i didn't get to sit in to blog about it but i'm still happy for you...."
Then later you were quite busy with your filming. And it was quite blast that show. I mean you had lots to present for your acting career in that role. And then once you came to talk to me on msn once, and you told me to go suggest to the producers of Budget Barbie to do a special episode for Little India. And you wanna be the guest/ co-host for that episode cox my viewers will definitely be able to relate since you're acting a relevant role. Yeah, that is if they view that serial drama =X
And you msn, wassap, DM me, MANY times, to put back up your blog link on my blog sidebar. I used to do HOTLINKS where i link up other people's blog, with their pictures, and i put them all on my sidebar. I removed yours. And you noticed. So yeah, your bugging me time and time again to put up your pictures, just make me NOT want to put it up more and more. And when i finally gave in to your bugging, i said, okay, send me your picture. You told me to go pick a nice one from your blog. Well, i did.. But days later.. I removed everyone. Becox i just can't stand the sight of you on my sidebar.
And then i hardly reply you. By that time i already stop picking up your calls and i hardly reply your messages and even when i do, i took 2 - 3 days to reply. You know that i don't do this to people.. Other than the people.. I wanna get away from. You should know it, i mean, since you keep talking about me like you know me so damn well =)
And then you msn me one other time later. I asked wassup and you told me
"Your dp looks very bad la =P"
"You still use it on Twitter and msn"
"Time to change it!!! You look so much better now"
"And it's been too long since we last went out to camwhore =P"
"Let's do it again!"
Okay, excuse me. Number one,
I personally, humbly, sincerely, do not agree that this looks bad. Lololol.
No really! I even actually thought "Ohhh, sexy" HAHAHA. Kidding lah. But it doens't look bad what!!!! But maybe that's just me.
Number two, even if it's not chio like mad, it does not motivate me enough to go do a photoshoot with you, where i'd snap 100 pictures of you, and you'd shoot 20 pictures of me, and then i'd photoshop ALL the pictures, and then i'd post it on my blog, and then you rip it and watermark it with your blog address, and then you post it.
Nope, it definitely doesn't look that bad enough for me to go through so much effort =D So i'm good with it being my dp! In fact i used it for the longest time just to show you how much i love it. Haha.
Then i have to attend a same event as you one evening. I was with Sophie. Do you remember? If you don't, Sophie and i can help. The PR personnel walk over to chit chat a little with me, we introduced ourselves and she asked me,
"So what do you do full time? Do you blog full time? Or?"
And before i could answer, you (sitting beside me on another table), help me reply,
"She's a full time housewife!"
And the lady went "Oh wow! You look so young!!!"
I HAD A FUCKING USAGI BAND ON MY HEAD, SIMI HOUSEWIFE. Lololol!!!
If i really was a housewife, i'd be a damn act-cute one. Lolol.
So i laughed and i said, "Yeah! I have two doggies in the house! And they are like my babies. Haha. So i stay home most of the time to look after them"
And then me and the lady continue to chit chat a little bit more, and she was asking me, "so what do you blog about actually? Cox i'd never have anything interesting to share about my life!"
And before i could answer, you replied the lady, "Her life is also not interesting! Haha. She tweets and blogs about shit. Like literately shit-shit. How the shit looks like lah, the colour, the shape. And you'd be surprised that there are actually people interested! She's candid in her way"
THANK YOU!!!! =DDDD BEST INTRODUCTION FOR MY BLOG EVER!!!! All that i ever wanted people to know about me and my blog, was that =DDD THANK YOU!!!!!
And you are now, like right now, blogging about how a casual joke made by Wendy was rude to your godsis *cold chill down the spine each time i type this*? Really?
And then i got a chance to hang out with Wendy more around this time or slightly later.
Your filming assignments ended. You got lotsa free time on your hand. Lotsa free time for your thoughts to go wild.
You might have noticed i've been doing random things like girlie photoshoot with a few girlfriends, do silly makeup and play with wigs randomly, have parties organised by my sponsor etc. Go for events every now and then with the girls.
And i have never asked you along and you never had a problem with that, for about TWO years. You had no problem with that.
And now, after i got slightly closer to Wendy, and you have more free time on hand, you totally gone bonkers. You were angry on Twitter, complaining about why you don't get to do your liposuction and how hard is it for slightly chubbier people like you to survive in the entertainment industry.
Anyway, i don't think you're chubby. And i don't think being slightly more chubby is why you find it hard to survive. If you're having a hard time getting, or finding something, then you look within ba. Stop look outwards. That's all i'd say, i won't dish out anymore advice to you in this post, or in the future anymore.
Anyway, with all the free time on your hand, you start to get creepy. You grew sour and bitter.
The first tweet i saw was "Feel like telling somebody that whatever she has now, everything, was all linked up by me. At least have the courtesy to invite me to their event! Geez!"
You tweeted that the next day after i blogged about the event i attended with other girls, organised by my facial sponsor. Nice.
I remember i tweeted something back, but never direct it to you, something emo and angry, in chinese. LOL. I know, i'm a bit gross sometimes. Hahaha.
But i left it there and then. Until.. Days later, Geck Geck came to tell me you called her out and you were crying when you told her about how i treated you, like all the ignoring you and stuff.
Then you really don't understand me at all. I've ignored guys, ladies, ridiculous request etc.. I ignore, but i'd hardly go all out to confront and ask the person to get the fuck out of my life. And with you, i practiced A LOT Of chances, patience, but you keep pulling my hair out. I had to get away before i dislike you to a point we can never be friends again.
And i've obviously ignored you for a long time. Look at this post.. People kept commenting to ask if it's you. I deleted all of it. I thought you should know, i mean.. SINCE YOU KNOW ME SO WELL, right? And then you have to come ask me if i'm blogging about you. I told you no, becox i was sick of you at that point of time, i don't even want to give you the chance to explain your gross actions.
So IGNORING, is the best tactic that i ever mastered since a long time. I'd ignore UNTIL things gets better! That's what i do! I ignore, and if our path ever cross again next time, there might be a chance for us to get close again. BUT.
You didn't let it rest. Instead of being sad purely becox we drifted (for good reasons), you went on to tell Geck Geck that i don't even know that Budget Barbie, my facial sponsor and the boob job, was all your effort. And that you helped me get those stuff.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT? That you help me get these stuff??? Oh, i'm a nobody, that's why everyone would wanna give me all these. And in return, i'm sure i don't have to put in effort, time and thoughts to make all these happen and maintain it well. I'm sure.
After i had first-hand experience on how you deal with life (other than your love life), times and times again, i decided that you're not someone i'd like to deal with on a regular basis. Simply becox i don't like drama. I don't like confrontation. And i give chances, after chances.
I don't mind, one more friend, is always better than one less. If you had left things where it was and just get a move on with your life.. It's not like i hate you or anything, why do you have to go around telling other people about these stuff???
Geck came to me telling me you have misunderstood me quite a fair bit and encouraged me to go clear the air with you. I said no i don't want to. Cox i am still angry that you could even think that i owe everything that i worked hard for, to you.
And then we left it there. AND THEN, you went to blog a longass post about Friends.
And i quote you in your post
"I don't want to be made to feel like because I'm no longer of use to you to get any higher, you decide to just toss me aside."
How, tell me how have i used you?
By photoshopping nice pictures for us, and then have you use it and watermark it as yours?
By introducing you to Click and then ended us both up on the front page of URBAN?
By putting up your bloglink with a nice picture of you on my sidebar since you first started your blog?
By agreeing to the facial sponsor meeting with you BECOX they only want to talk to BOTH of us?
And becox you told the producers of Budget Barbie that i'm good at sourcing out cheap stuff?
Is that why you think i owe everything i have to you? And that i've used you?
BTW, just to clarify, BUDGET BARBIE $100 / EPISODE idea was not yours. They had that idea long time ago, waiting for someone to fit in. FYI. So you don't have to keep thinking that that show was meant to be yours just cox you said you can do shopping show out of the 10 categories of shows you said you could host and live up to.
"Maybe she's caught up in the popularity contest and she feels I don't belong in that league."
No it's not the popularity contest. What popularity contest? What world are you living in? Not everybody's head is full of these stuff. Perhaps you raised that point cox you and your friends think so. You keep telling me "A lot of people came to tell me you've changed too"
WELL, I AM NOT CLOSE TO A LOT OF PEOPLE WHO WILL GO TALK TO YOU ACTUALLY.
SO WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
And i'm sure the people who actually KNOWS me, will not think i've changed in the way they tell you. So i'm 100% sure that people who'd go talk to you about how i've changed, are not, and were NEVER close to me.
So why do you keep telling me that people say i've changed like it's a bigfuck point?!?!?!
It DOESN'T BOTHER ME!!!
My friends and i are still close. My boyfriend still loves me. My family loves me even more. My blog is doing fine. My doggies are healthy. SO WHAT CHANGE? And is the change bad or good? I'd say good since i'm a happier person than before.
SO WHY IS MY CHANGE A BAD THING?
What bothers me is you keep saying it like just becox YOUR side of the people told YOU i've changed (and god knows what you've said to them to make them come tell you this anyway) then i'd have to be convinced that i'm a bad person now? Doesn't make any sense.
If i were to be affected by you telling me so-and-so said what to you, therefore i should do what and what, if i had listened to everyone who buys your sob stories, i'd be a total screw-up now.
So i emailed you, and tell you that i saw your blog post about Friends and that i know you're talking about me. And i told you i'm surprised you even think that way cox i dare say i've never made use of you. EVER.
(BTW, i can insert screenshots of most of the things but this post is not for you guys, this is for YOU and you know what you did so i don't have to use screenshots to prove my points)
BUT THIS ONE, is classic.
"I guess it felt like I was losing you to people you thought more interesting. I want to be part of that, and I hope you know it."
OOoooOOOOoooooohhhhh. NOW WE ALL KNOW. The root and early cause of this whole saga now, is cox you want to be a part of the interesting people i mix with?!?! And you hope that i know!
YES, NOW I KNOW.
You want to friend people like Sophie, Wendy, Yutaki, Eric, Kaykay and the rest? GO FRIEND THEM YOURSELF LAH!!!!! They like you or not is another thing right??!?!?! I am not there to control their thoughts!!!
You tweet them everytime they still got reply you what! Not good enough you ask them out lah!!!
You can't put it on my tab and expect me to introduce you to all my friends, and expect them to like you right back. Right?! Besides, i never seen you keen to be a part of Mich, Zhen and myself? I never seen you keen to be a part of me, Yong Ming and Ming Zhou?!?!
And now you wanna be a part of the people i thought is more interesting. And i didn't hang out with those people cox they are more interesting, i hang out with them cox they are nice + have common topics and frequency about stuff. And we just can clique, HOW COMPLICATED you want to make this sound?!
So i left it telling you we should both go find people who influence us for the better. And told you to take care.
Three months ago
You DM me like a plea-shoutout, almost begging me to just tell you what is it exactly that i'm unhappy about. And to not treat you so coldly cox you can't take it anymore.
So i said okay, msn and we'd talk.
So we talked. And i told you 70% of what i'm unhappy about (refering to most of the stuff mention above in this post) and you either
1) deny all of it and saying that that's not your main intention
2) Saying that i think too much and read too much into things.
Okay! So let's save our time. And i'd go deal with myself, i'd be fine. I've been perfectly fine everytime, until you come disrupt my peace.
You go deal with yourself.. OH, NOT FINE. You are a human, you need reassurance, you have feelings, you can't take it that i treat you so coldly, i am someone still close to your heart.. BLABLABLA.
YEAH ALRIGHT, i get it! You want me to pretend like "Oh, i've been too sensitive this two years, i thought too badly of all her fucked-up actions, okay! She actually still treasure me a lot as a friend despite all the shit she does! Lai, let's be BFF again!!!" =DDD
It's not gonna happen.
Here are some of the things i told you during the 'showdown' and how you responded to them:
- I told you about the facial sponsorship thing, and how unhappy i am that you go around telling people that i owe it to you.
You told me you introduced me to D if not D didn't know about me.. Oh yeah i'm sure. SHE EMAILED ME when she was working at the previous company!!!!!!! Want to lie also get your facts right first. And you told me that YOU convinced D to loop me in too. Oh, THEN TELL ME WHY 1) She's only keen to meet us BOTH and not when it's you alone? 2) In the end the ambassadorship went ahead with me alone. You must be so important, like you think you are.And truth to be told, D is such a nice person.. But becox you wanna validate your point that i stole something from you, you made me out to be the bad guy, but you failed. So then you make up another story, saying D said i persuaded her to sign me cox i'm a better choice. And saying that D told you i manage to swing her to my side.. You're such a dirty little liar. D was nice to BOTH of us. In fact D was one of those nice quiet girls. And you could stuff all these shit in her mouth. You win.
- I told you about how Budget Barbie wasn't YOUR idea.
You told me "Do you know that they asked me what i can host? And i told them blablablablabala 197320 categories of shows, and that i was the one who told them you are good at buying cheap stuff and making it look good. And that maybe we could do something together. But in the end you got Budget Barbie."- I told you that part i'm unhappy with regards to the boob job saga is that you asked me how i am, i replied describing the kind of pain i was going through, instead of caring for me, you immediately jump on how upset you are that you didn't get to sit in to blog about it. And you went on questioning me about why nobody inform you. And how disappointed you are.
You told me you helped me persuade my doctor to do the boob job for me after you pulled out for lipo, OH REALLY?
My doctor is a professional and he does this to help me, purely out of goodwill, WHY WOULD HE GO LISTEN TO YOUR PERSUASION??? And then you continue to tell me you got into depression becox you felt that you let me down cox you couldn't do the lipo. Dude, your problem. Why would i be angry cox YOU can't do lipo on YOUR body? Doesn't make sense.
And then you told me you admit that you are bitter and sour becox you are angry. Angry that somehow all the good things that brushed against you, turn out to be mine. And that you ended up with nothing.
I understand your frsutration.. BUT DON'T TAKE IT OUT ON ME??? Can????
- I told you that my bf discourage me from hanging out with you for whatever reasons mentioned above in this post.
And then you were so persistent in wanting to get to his contact and talk it out with him.. I ask him on the spot while we were trashing out, he said "Don't bother lah. What for?" And i told you.
And you insist. And you insist. And then i told you what makes you think he'd be bothered to talk it out with you, when he can't even bother to talk it out with the more important people in our lives who had problems with us.
Which you, with much EVIL INTENTION, added into your blogpost dedicated to me, with details and all. How could you share something like that about my bf (who is a very private person) on your blog?!?!
And you make it seem like my bf was the largest barrier between me and you. PLEASE, it's YOU. And you never wanted to apologise for three years. Suddenly now you want to get closer again (for whatever reasons only you know) and i said no for various reasons and out of which, you wanna bang on my bf as the main reason for it?!
But i am thankful, that my bf knows and understands what kinda person we're dealing with here.
A PSYCHO.
You form your own thoughts. And you live and believe in them.
Which is all fine, i mean, i set my mind to ignore you as much as i can already. So this 'showdown' was becox you were asking for it so badly that i felt bad for you. And true to what i thought, you will not admit or even agree that you were being a less-than-nice person.
Cox you know, in your SSparkly world, you're always the nice one. Trying to be real. Trying to show your blog readers the 'truest' side of you, the real you, AS-IS *rolleyes*
Here, take this post, help yourself to it. Since they love the real you. Like they love how you paint me and my bf out to be in your post about me. They jumped on it. And they commented the worst, most nonconstructive, hurtful comments about me and Wendy. And you approved every single one of them like it's a trophy in your blogging portfolio.
I know, i seem so calm. But wait, i'm not done.
Now you're a changed person again! It's good lah! Since your "play victim" technique didn't get you far. It sure piss me off a lot when i hear it from people but that's about that. I didn't even wanna bother much about what you said. Cold, ditched you for higher grounds, done making use of you etc. Yeah, heard it all. Next time maybe filter who you tell things to.
Or did you purposely tell them so they'd come tell me?
Now you take on another approach!!! *another round of applause*
You were the middleman for some blogger event and you invited lotsa bloggers to attend. And then after that you guys hang out for a meal.
And deng deng deng~ You told everybody what?!?! You said
- I took the facial sponsorship from you becox? "You know lah, when girls hang out too much, and they start talking, this is what happens" You told them i tried to get closer to D, then persuade D to sign me and not you.
DUDE, THERE WERE TWO FUCKING CONTRACTS!!!! ONE FOR YOU, ONE FOR ME. YOU FUCKING WENT TO ACCEPT ANOTHER COMPETITOR'S OFFER, then 6 weeks later you wanna come back to this, you think what? Like your character? Can flip around and all round?!
AND YOU TOLD THEM YOU MISSED A FEW MEETINGS, OR WERE LATE, and i ended up being closer to D becox of that. Liar, you knew there were only TWO MEETINGS, and on both, you were present. Late for a bit, yes, but you were there. Say until you fucking missed out on lotsa of meeting and i had a chance to backstab you like this. Pui.
And you were so gross, you told them there's no way i could be chosen over you cox you had more readership than me at that point of time. You never had more readership than me. Fact. Why don't you tell them the truth?!?! That you chose to do competitor's brand? And then when you're done, and you wanted to come back, D didn't want to sign you. She did tell me why thou, from business point of view. It's bad for their company to just accept you over now, and it's also bad for the previous company you advertised for, if you just jump in a short period change, like that.
And i don't understand lor!!! Higher readership makes you feel good is it?! Okay that i can understand (lol), BUT COMPETING WITH YOUR FRIEND?!?!?! NI FAN BU FAN?!
Keep asking me for my stats. And even during the 'showdown', you told me you search my blog on alexa, and that my stats is doing a lot better than yours blablabla. And say that Wendy's blog is top how many. And that she really deserves a goddess title etc. Things you care about - Interesting. NOT.
- And then you told them that my bf hates you becox you had depression. HA. HA. HA. And they asked you, how is that possible cox depression is not contagious. And what did you say? "I DON'T KNOW! I am already so cham (pityful), got fucked over by my ex bf, and her bf down there don't allow her to meet me"
Oh. You don't know. But i told you during the show down what. You don't know? YOU PAISEH TO SAY, THEN DON'T SAY!!!!! When i confronted you about that, what did you say? You said "Then what do you expect me to tell them??? That i bit him?!?! That i was out of control and i drunk-drive you home?!"
NOPE. That's not what i want you to say although THAT, is the truth. I don't care about controlling you or what you are expected to say, or not to say. I'm not your mother. But if you choose to say it, tell the truth. Telling them my bf hates you cox you had depression, is as bad as, for example,
I slept with your husband, and then i slept with your son, and then i contaminate your makeup and made you grow 50 pimples, and then you slap me and scold me "SLUTWHORE I HOPE YOU DIE" after you realise. And then i go tell the whole world,
"She slapped me and then hope that i die =((( Why? I don't know~~~ Wuhoo.. ='((( I treated her as someone close to my heart.. I hope she knows that, that i still love her as a friend.. A lot. Wuhoo =(("
FUCK YOU AND YOUR CROCODILE TEARS!!!!!!!!!!1111111
You discounted and omitted all the things that happened in between. Why? Cox you feel shameful of it, maybe. I don't know. But since you told me in our confrontation wassap messages when i asked you why you told people shit about my bf, you replied "Oh excuse me? I didn't know our history is to be kept a secret"
Oh yeah? Here you go. This whole fucking blogpost just for you.
Online feuds are online feuds. But when you pull in my loved ones.. You were looking for this post, right? Bookmark it! I spent a lot of time on it. And it won't interest anyone else but you. Since your letter to me, was a blog post. I thought my letter to you, should be a blogpost too =D Yay~ This is how we roll, right?
Oh oh, that's not all! What, did you think i was gonna leave out the fact that YOU ARE A TWO-FACED BITCH?!?!?!?!?!?!
Wait, by now it should be TWO-FACED PSYCHO BITCH.
During NAPBAS, you tweeted a WHOLE lot of nice stuff to Wendy. And then when we met in the toilet, you went "女神! 女神~ 我要跟女神拍照"
YOU, CALLED HER A GODDESS, AND JUMPED SAYING YOU WANT TO SNAP PICTURES WITH HER.
Totally fine, right? And then you went on, to blog a whole lot of nice stuff about her and her winning, i quote you,
"I super major love her pink hair and full-sequinned blue dress that night. She looked a million bucks, yet still maintained a cutesy-pretty feel about her. =)"
"I was hopping so excitedly at my table in my supposedly-elegant dress that I thought I must have looked ridiculous. But I was genuinely happy that she won. I mean, come on, every single product she advertises for, SELLS. And I mean, SELL LIKE MAD kinda sell. If that is not influential, I don't know what is."
"It hasn't been an easy journey for her, but Xiaxue is where she is now, and I am truly very very happy for her. She, plus Qiuting, were my very very first inspirations to start blogging. =D"
"女王, 这个名称, 我不是乱叫, 也没有白叫. 我会永远支持你!!!!!"
OH. BUT that's not what we heard!!! Was it? What did you tell those bloggers?
You told them that Wendy will be a nobody if not for her being popular online. Cox she's so short and unnoticeable in real life. And that's why she have to dye blonde and now, pink hair.
So you said you don't understand what is there for her to be so yaya-papaya about. And that she's so arrogant cox you tried so many times to be friends with her but she always gave you this attitude.
What got into you........ I mean you're psychotic, bitchy, mean and act like the one with a bigger heart all the time, BUT NOW YOU ALSO DO LIES????
You wanna lie about such stuff??? You lie about me and how i snatch things from you to people, and you lie about my bf hating you for the wrong reason, and then now you wanna be two-faced about how you feel for Wendy?!?!?!
On all the occasions that Wendy met you, i was there. And btw CNY open house, SHE WAS FUCKING FRIENDLY with EVERYONE lah!!!!!!! Even the bloggers whom she had saga with previously, she still spoke to them during poker and card game. As much as she spoke to you.
That aside, why, she must be extra friendly to you is it? Cannot accept that in life, not everyone will adore you, is it? What is wrong with you! People never reciprocate your friendship then you like this talk shit about people.
If you truly like and admire somebody, you don't start to talk shit of that person just becox you tried to be friends and she didn't show you back the same kind of friendliness you shown to her.
You don't say nonsense like "I like her personality and her blog but can't say the same about her character thou" Yeah, but in your blogpost on NAPBAS, you said you will FOREVER SUPPORT HER???
In your blogpost about me, you even dare say i twisted your words from the conversation you had with those bloggers, then tell Wendy another story about you. Haha, you think i'm you ah?
I can't name names of the others who told me details about what you told them that day, and on other occasions where you met them, but Yutaki came to tell me to clear the air with you cox you seem really unhappy about me and the past. But he doesn't know what happened between me and you in the past so he don't want me to know about what he heard that day. Cox i've never told him about it. And he was afraid that if he told me that you told everybody, i'd get major pissed.
So he just say ask me to talk to you since you have lotsa misunderstanding about me and Wendy. And i'm sure he has his own way of looking at it but..
YUTAKI IS FINALLY STEPPING OUT TO SAY WHAT EXACTLY HE HEARD THAT DAY!!!!!!!
I'm sure you don't need to read lah, you definitely remember what you said. And what Yutaki blogged about, triangulates with what the others told me, so who could the liar be but you?!?!?!
Telling them that D and i got close becox you were late on several occasions?!?!?! REALLY?!?! WE ONLY HAD TWO MEETINGS. And you CHOSE not to sign the contract and go do competitor's advert first. Now you blame me and D for it. Really.. You.. Are hopeless.
And telling them i'm angry about you not being able to do lipo with me while i do boob job?!?! Bitch, i told you EXACTLY what i'm unhappy about during the showdown.. What's your point of begging for me to tell you why i'm unhappy, and then you go tell people another story?
The past few days, you get confronted with the shit you do and say, and after attempts to deny failed, you'd give up and say "Yes, i said that, but i don't mean blablablablabla"
YOU SAID WHAT, YOU MEANT WHAT.
YOU DID WHAT, YOU MEANT WHAT.
Okay? Don't try to cook up a subtle and gentle side of what you said as an excuse for all the shit you said behind people's back.
Everytime in your post/ wassap, you start off righteous and angry and then you wanna end of with "no hard feelings", "I don't want any more drama", "You still have a special place in my heart"
WELL, I'D TELL YOU WHAT, if i'm like what your post made me out to be, so awful and manipulative and mean and no sense of self, and copies Wendy etc, if i'm so bad, i say you give that slot to someone else.
Please, give it away, please.
And before this ends, i wanna talk about your godsis and Wendy's incident. You brought this up during the lunch with the rest of the bloggers. When you were talking about how arrogant Wendy is. I think you thought that this would prove your point that Wendy is truly an arrogant person.
Here's what happened, AND I BET YOUR GUTS, even your godsis can't remember it well.
Your godsis didn't went to pick up leaves on the grass patch (as what she commented and then disclaim that she can't remember exactly what happened), she was packing up some rubbish on the floor in the studio/ office cox we just had McDee and some people were still eating, but she was just clearing up the rest of the bits of rubbish hanging around that wasn't placed inside the rubbish bag yet.
Which is really a nice gesture!!! I agree!!!
And then a girl asked her "Why you keep clearing up those stuff!"
And your godsis went "职业病".
Which means it's a habit she picked up in her job.
Stupid answer. Nobody knows that you're a producer who habitually packs and organised stuff lah okay, anyway you said in the filming profile that you're an aspiring singer. Then how we know?!
So Wendy jokingly said "Huh, 你的职业是清洁工人啊?"
The joke was there!!! She had to go for it! I mean, what other job could her job be if she said cleaning rubbish is something she picked up in her job? And NO, nobody thinks it's a kind of discrimination to joke that her being a cleaner is of negative reference. Why? You ownself think being a cleaner is very low is it? That's why offended?
Had your godsis been posing, and people ask, "Why you keep posing!" and she say 职业病, and then Wendy reply "You're a model huh!" THEN HOW? NOT OFFENSIVE AND RUDE ANYMORE?
*rolleyes*
It's not like your godsis IS a cleaner, and yet Wendy go poke fun of it. CLEARLY, she is not. So i don't see why you guys have to kick up a storm, for something small that happened months ago.
And everyone laughed over it. But of course to you, Silver, it's a big deal right? Something that you can blow up and feed on, when people agree with you that Wendy is a rude and arrogant person.
You godsis called you to briefly whine about it, and then you took this and make a big deal out of it at the conversation with the bloggers.
And after you're done, WHAT DID YOUR GODSIS SAY???
"Oh yeah, if you didn't say, i'd have forgotten about it"
Yes i'm sure it hurt her and scarred her as much as you made it up to sound like.
I'm not here to prove to the whole world that you did this this and this. I'm here to remind you of the things you did.. To remind yourself of all the things that you conveniently forget, to be able to think of yourself as a victim now.
Whatever you do.. Stop cooking stories and then play victim. I'm not gonna end this as nice as you did. Truth be told, i did this post JUST FOR YOU. To leave me alone and to get out of my life. You did so many things and you could flipped words around just so they work in your advantage.
I kept quiet through the months and didn't blog a single shit about it nor approve a single comment telling me you blogged about me in your Friends post.. Becox i thought ignoring you.. Would make you leave quietly.
If you honestly think that our friendship means so much, that letter on your blog now would have been an actual email in my inbox now.
But you chose to put it on your blog, and said all these shit (mostly untrue) and then pull in my bf. And want people to look at him like he's this petty, old and sad man.
You lost your special place in my heart when you invited me to go on a yacht with a rich guy in the gaming industry who invited you and one of your sizzling hot girlfriend on the yacht set sail for a luxury resort in Bali for just the three of us.
Thank you for telling me that "when he said hot girlfriend i immediately thought of you =)" but no thanks to such indecent proposal when you know i'm attached to this petty, old and sad bf.
And, last thing, you said so much about how you see a lot of Wendy's style in my blogpost, the way i do advertorial and even the way i photoshop my pictures, you told me so much advice on how to blog and be myself over wassap, and on your blogpost. I'm thankful!
But i'm not the one having to spun stories, tell lies, twist facts and omit shameful details about myself, just so i can get barely over 2 thousand hits from my daily 700 - 800 hits.
But since i've blogged about you, look at your stats! =DDD
Happy ma? =D You care so much about stats, you confirm happy right!
Let's look at our motives individually for wanting to start this saga now lah, okay.
Your motives for creating all these saga with Wendy and i:
- You whole freaking time so super care about blog stats, even went to Alexa search me and Wendy etc, so i guess you wanted this so you could have your stats go up. Look at the graph! Wendy tweeted your name, and your stats went from 700/800 to 2000! You blogged shit about me, and your stats went from 1400 up to 2200 again! Congrats! Now that i blogged about you, your stats went to? 8000+. And yet you still keep taunting me and Wendy on your Twitter.
- You mentioned to me during the 'showdown' that your acting/ hosting gig request is decreasing and the income is really low. And that you can barely survive on it. So now you are keen to take up blogshop adverts, and that's why you told me to send you the template on how i charge. I guess you think this fame can make you call for more money from advertisers.
My motives for creating all these saga with you:
OH, NOTHING~ Cox I wasn't the one creating saga!!!!! You talk shit about people to so many people, and then we tweet to ask you to stop it, cannot?!??! I didn't even mentioned names!!! Yes Wendy did but DID YOU NOT SAY SHIT ABOUT HER TO BLOGGERS?!?!?!?
SEE YUTAKI'S POST!!!!!!!
You did! And this is not the only bunch of people you tell to. ADMIT IT. We just don't want to name names like you did during our wassap conversation. At first sign of me confronting you, you mentioned FOUR NAMES. One of which is Brad (ladyironchef) but he's how fucking innocent in this case please. He only met you once and he didn't even say anything about you to me. And then when you finally admit to saying stuff, you quickly pointed out that Christine and Yutaki and Brad also said a lot of shit about me and Wendy as well. Sigh..
I honestly do not believe that Xtine said anything with mean/ evil intention like you did. She was probably commenting, gossip session, expected. No biggie. BUT LOOKS WHO'S COMMANDING and manipulating the gossip session, and leading people to believe what she wants them to believe? YOU. Yet you go dish out other people's name when being exposed.
YOU ARE A LOUSY PERSON. So stop offering the special spots in your heart (which is not that big lah, please. Big hearts don't go for dramas like you have been dashing for) to people.
And then out of nowhere, you're doing magatorial too! Nise!!! It's okay, don't have to credit magatorial to me even thou i strung that word together =)
I will not respond to any of your blogpost after this, or discreet tweetacks/ sad tweets directing for me to see etc. Becox reading your tweets is like watching you act, so unnatural. I QUOTE YOU AGAIN, you tweeted "Sorry, I don't know how to tweet sarcastic/horrible/nasty things abt u the way u can about me. I just cannot bring myself to do it."
BITCH PLEASE, YOU ALREADY DID SO, ON SEVERAL OCCASIONS, blog shit, twice, tweet shit, freaking so many times! I know you're tweeting those to show people how much exactly you value me even though you write so much shit about me on your blog (confusing).
Now, tell me, when was the last time you had your mental state checked? You need professional help. Tell your doctor "Wuhoo.. Everybody is against me.. I just wanna be friends! Qiuting is so mean! Wuhoo.. =((" URGH. SAVE IT.
How long will the anti-xx and anti-me feed on this? You interesting enough ma? Not interesting enough for the long run, you gotta find something else to bang on already. I mean, afterall Wendy and i both gave our best to you liao.
Oh and.. You keep saying Wendy 'took' me away from you. No she didn't.
I walked away. Too slowly apparently. I mean look at how long this worthless post is.
Oh, that's not all! Someone emailed me to tell me she left this comment your blog, but you didn't approve it. Here's what she commented:
"Wow! *clap clap* Mediacorp has trained you well. Talk about twisting everything to become sinister and creating the world's biggest pity party for yourself.
Aren't you the saddest little dimpled girl just wanting to be a true friend to others?
But here's what I think, reading between the lines. First, let's talk about the "depression". Please don't insult that word with your boyfriend melodrama. Dating married men and feeling so sad? Oh honey, were you the victim who deserves true love? Please, depression is a medical condition. Yours is just you seeking attention, perhaps training to be the next Best Actress. If God exists, he wont torture the next decent man by introducing you to his life.
Then you talk about Qiuting's bf as if he is the main catalyst in the destruction of your oh so precious friendship. That he is the world's pettiest man, refusing to "clear the air" with you, and of course you validate this by exposing that he is in bad terms with his own relatives, something Qiuting told you in confidence.
She has always been very private about her bf. If you are a true friend as you claim, you should know better than to talk about him against her wishes, moreover exposing little secrets she told you. Have you thought about jeopardising her relationship with him if he reads your post? "Why did you tell Silver about my relatives?" - Noooo... You don't care, you just want to play the victim. Why don't you post his pictures while you are at it? That should piss Qiu off, she deserves it, doesn't she?
You wished to clear the air with Qiuting's bf. Why would he want to clear the air with you after you fucking bit him like a psycho bitch? You are NOBODY to him, there is nothing to salvage or fix. You showed him your true colours and he decided he doesn't like you. That's that. Sometimes people don't want to fix stuff because... Well why bother to fix a $1 chair? After fixing it's probably worth $0.20 - not worth the trouble.
You write as if Qiuting decided to stop being friends with you because her bf forbade her. Have you considered perhaps she was just using that an excuse to stop hanging out with you because you are a shitty person?
And then the two other reasons - XX and Click, combined with Qiu's rising popularity, made her so arrogant that she decided to neglect you. No. Sure, she did become friends with XX and got more popular, but she started to neglect you just then because it became more and more apparent you were jealous and uncomfortable with her fame, which was beginning to eclipse yours. You also idolised XX, but XX chose to be friends with Qiu and not you. Dammit, you were a celebrity first, what happened? Why should people pay more attention to that flat-chested girl than you?
You became toxic. She didn't change... you did. Nobody wants to deal with a green-eyed monster who puts them down all the time. You just chose to believe you had no part to play the demise of the friendship.
Speaking of friendship - it is so easy to just keep going on and on about how sad you are to lose this one. Were you a true friend to her?
What have you done for her, really, to make it such that she should have tried her best to salvage her friendship with you because it's so worth it and you are so fantastic as a friend?
Did you visit her after her boob job to see if she is ok, or buy food for her to heal quickly? Or were you just sulking, sour you didn't get to sit in on her surgery to get a slice of the attention pie? She complains about migraines - have you even googled remedies to help her deal with her pain or introduced good doctors to her?
And now you paint her as this worthless, fame-seeking, grovelling lackey with a petty crazy boyfriend for the world to see. Are you pleased with the comments insulting her? Feels good?
A fantastic friend you are indeed, someone should give you a fucking trophy for your efforts. Now you see why everybody wants to be friends with you! XX and Qiuting must be idiots"
WELL SAID!!!!!! Why did i bother blogging this whole shit man, that comment would have summarised my blogpost!
And why you like this! People say i lackey and that you're prettier than me, you approve. They say hope that Wendy will never be able to reproduce, you approve. They say shit about you, you no approve. That's not nice! Please learn how to respect people's feelings leh. Trollololol.
Okay it's not like i look forward to putting this post up, it's about 12,000 - 13,000 words long, nobody is keen. So i don't look forward to it. But since you wanna be so insane, and keep pretending by telling people you don't know why we drifted, and tried to push it to my bf, to Wendy, to the change in me after i got close to Wendy etc. NOW THIS POST, shall serve as a reminder. Each time you wanna think "I'm so innocent~ I don't know! I didn't do anything! I was young! Wuhoo.. =((" THEN YOU READ THIS AGAIN BA.
By the way, YOUNG is not an excuse to all the shit you did. However young at whichever point of time you were at, remember i was two years and 13 days younger than you. Now stop sulking.
When i knew from your comments that you were coming up with a closure post, i thought you would at least apologise to Wendy for talking shit about her to people. But no.. You went on to talk more shit about me then wanna sign off with telling me i still hold a sepcial place in your heart. Now i know why your heart whole fucking day kena hurt, COX YOU KEEP WHORING IT OUT and it loses its worth.
Please, if it's so close to your heart, keep it close, keep it hush, keep it within you and the other party. Don't whore it on Twitter and your blog. After the confrontation, you admitted that you said stuff about my bf and then said you'd just shut up next time if people ask about our history. But look what you did next? Put up a Letter to a Dear Friend.. Filled with insults and your own self-pity and pulling my bf into this.. Tsk.. You've crossed the line. And i tweeted this, you know it's for you..
你敬我一尺 我敬你一"仗". 外加预赠你 "三思" - 后果, 后路, 自负.
So for all the things you did the past years and especially recently, you really can't blame me for how things turn out this way. Blame your own big mouth, insecurities, lame expectation of people you're nice to to be equally nice to you, and your desire to rush your way to be a part of the "interesting" people like you mentioned, also your fake niceness and screwed mentality. Oh no, this is not a war anyway, not a PK, right? But i'm sure you'd come back with something cox that'd help your blog stats to grow =) Go ahead and prove me right. I rest my case here.
I don't have to make people think i'm the good guy here, but at least i can tell the truth.
You have to really stop telling lies.. Since the post's been up, people keep emailing me to tell me things about you. I'd never post them. But i just hope you'd back off. Don't taunt us anymore.. Don't keep pulling Mint into this. I sincerely feel bad for her.
I don't have to make people think i'm the good guy here, but at least i can tell the truth.
You have to really stop telling lies.. Since the post's been up, people keep emailing me to tell me things about you. I'd never post them. But i just hope you'd back off. Don't taunt us anymore.. Don't keep pulling Mint into this. I sincerely feel bad for her.
Okay. You know what will make this cool despite it being worthless to most of you who are not the ones involved? If i seal my 7 years story with..