Going crazy

    I remember when i was in primary school, i abhor going to visit the dentist so much.. Each time a boy/ girl come running to my class with the clipboard, i'd pray and thank god if it's not me.

    And then if it's me, i'd have to hold the clipboard, and walk to the dental clinic in the school =( Each time this happen, it's like the world fall apart. Lol.

    There was once i remember most vividly, i was called twice in a week and the second time, i could not believe i'm so sway again. I mean.. This is like a twice a year event, isn't it?! But then i guess it's all becox i don't brush my teeth when i was younger =S Lol. So i have more to fix than the other kids.

    Anyway.. The second time i was called, i took the clipboard, and i ran to the area behind the dental clinic. I could watch the dentist from the window. I just stood there.. For about 15 minutes? You know how i know it's about 15mins although i didn't wear a watch?

    Cox i can hear the dentist calling the office, saying the student from my class is still not at the clinic yet, and it's been about 15 minutes and she was asking if they could make an annoucement for me. Lol. Yeah i know right, deep-rooted attention-seeker, i am. Lolol.

    Okay the next part is FREAKING SHITTY MAX. My principal Mrs Chew or Mdm Chew i can't remember, appear at the dental clinic cox she wanna ask the dentist what happened. And that's when i finally know, OKAY, TROUBLE ALERT.


    So really no choice, i had to show up =((

    All i remember was slurred conversations warning me that what i did was wrong, it worries people, next time if i ever do it again i have to go to the principal office. Blah blah blah. Seriously, i was scared shitless.

    All i could think of is "Quickly drill what you want, fill what you have to, and let me go off pleaseeeeeeeee. And God please don't let my tongue get drilled. Please please please please please....."

    So.. Now i'm a grownup. BUT IT IS ALL STILL THE SAME =((((((((((

    The worry is the same, i mean seriously, what if somebody pushes the dentist from the back when he's working on the inside of my mouth and then he accidentally slice my tongue off?!?!??!

    Do you know that our teeth are somehow linked to the nerves in our brain?! This is why when we get toothache, we get headache too =((

    And then the last time i had to go for an operation to extract my wisdom tooth, it was NASTY. Okay? NASTY SHIT. First, the doctor made me sign a contract, saying that i will not hold them responsible if there is any permanent damage to my sense of taste, and if there is permanent numbness to my tongue.

    And also, i cannot hold them responsible if i die in the operation.

    Also, i cannot hold them responsible if i have any permanent speech deficiency after the operation.

    Tell me, WANT TO DIE OR NOT? Die better right?! Everything also cannot hold them responsible. THEN HOLD WHO RESPONSIBLE?!?!?! HUH?!?!? WHO!!!!

    =((( I'm sorry. There's a few stages to dealing with a bad situation. First is denial. I'm passed that already. Then it's anger. I'm at it now. Not helping. And the whole time, i'm just sad and worried and terrified =(

    Also, the last time was Michelle who accompanied me to the dental clinic to extract that wisdom tooth. Lol. Dentist say if it's painful, i raise my hand. So seconds later, i raised my hand, and go "AH!" like it's painful. But fact is, the dentist haven't even do anything yet. LOL.

    Okay so maybe it's not that bad right? =D I'm really going crazy at this rate. One moment i'm all positive and encouraging myself. The next moment i'm angry at why the cb wisdom tooth have to happen. WHY CAN'T IT NOT HAPPEN??? WHAT GOOD DOES IT DO TO HUMAN BEINGS? Huh?

    My friend say grow wisdom tooth means i'm smart. I know he's bullshitting me =( He can grow all the wisdom tooth he wants. Lol. One whole mouthful of it then. I don't even know the difference between using teeth and tooth, and i don't care, so i don't need to be smart.

    Say so much, later still must go see dentist =( I hope you didn't spend time reading this. I'm really going through a monologue with myself.

    WISDOM TOOTH, WHY YOU NO DIE A NATURAL DEATH!!!! And why must spend $700 to cut my gum to pull you out?!?!?!? WHYYYYyyyyyyy.........

    I'm brave. I'm brave. I will pull through.

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